


take me by the hand

by cammm



Series: love + pinkie promises [2]
Category: SKAM (Norway)
Genre: Evak - Freeform, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Sequel, college acceptance letter, long distance, tags will change
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-11-29
Packaged: 2020-01-05 09:37:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 28,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18363395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cammm/pseuds/cammm
Summary: Sequel to That’s All I Really Know.Even gets a college acceptance letter from a school in America and isn’t sure what to do. He receives love and encouragement from Isak to go for it.Though, Even isnt prepared for all that comes. From a homophobic roommate, too many parties, new friends and re-closeting himself,  Even isn’t sure he’s doing anything right.Especially since he’s leaving Isak in the dark about all of it.





	1. prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEIIII!!   
> I’m so excited about this new work and I hope you are too!! Welcome to the sequel to That’s All I Really Know, titled Take Me By The Hand❤️ 
> 
> Please let me know what you think❤️
> 
> (Italics at the top of the page are excerpts from Even’s journal that is mentioned in TAIRK)
> 
> I love you so much and welcome to this new journey. 
> 
> Happy reading everyone Xx

_...I can’t tell if life is playing a joke on me or not. I constantly worry about plans being followed through, yet, here I am, not following through with the plan. Or, maybe I am. I don’t know. My mom thinks I need to talk to Isak about everything. I’ve been stressed out about telling him since I got the envelope in the mail. I’m not even going to accept, so maybe I shouldn’t tell him. Maybe I don’t need to. Although, he’s coming for dinner tonight at my house and I know my mom will just keep glancing at me until she knows I’ve told him... _

  
  


There was a knock on the door which drew Even’s attention away from his journal. With a sigh, he closed the hardcover of it and got up, already knowing who was waiting for him to answer. 

 

He felt a lot of different emotions zip through him as he pulled open the door to see a gap toothed grin and shining green eyes. 

 

“Hei,” Isak hummed, stepping forward to kiss Even hello. 

 

“Halla,” Even mumbled back, leaning in again to get another kiss - a much longer kiss. He ran his fingers up and down Isak’s back, slipping one hand into the back pocket of his jeans. Stepping with Isak to the side, he used his other hand to close the front door. 

 

Isak had been away for a few days with Jonas. They’d gone on a short weekend trip with Jonas’ parents. Even was glad Isak was home, though. 

 

They separated with soft grins and deep sighs. 

 

“Hei,” Isak said again.

 

Even chuckled, pressing a firm kiss to his forehead, “Halla. I missed you.”

 

“I was only away for two days, Even.”

 

“Are you saying you  _ didn’t _ miss me?”

 

A blush plastered itself on Isak’s cheeks and he shook his head, “Not even a little bit.”

 

“Nei?” 

 

Even watched curls toss as Isak shook his head again. Isak wrapped his arms around the taller boy’s neck and said in a teasing voice, “I can’t think of any reason as to why I’d miss you.”

 

“Not one?” Even asked, eyebrows high on his forehead. 

 

“You know…” Isak hummed in faux thought, “maybe there are actually a few reasons.” The two boys smiled at each other, completely in love and happy to be in the other’s arms. 

 

“I love you.”

 

Even really did. He loved Isak so much. He watched Isak press his lips together as the blush on his cheeks returned, “I love you, too. And I missed you.”

 

They shared a few more sticky kisses in reunion before Even stepped back, holding both of Isak’s wrists, “Let’s go downstairs.”

 

“I’ve been waiting for you to say that. We can race to see who can get naked the fastest,” Isak said, smirking. Even could see his anticipation and excitement, but he had to take care of something first. 

 

“I’d love to get naked with you, but I have to talk to you about something first.”

 

Isak sighed, letting his body be much heavier for Even to drag along. He hung his head backward pulling against Even, “I’ve been back for a total of four minutes and you want to have a talk What did I do?”

 

“Come on,” Even urged gently, leading his boyfriend down the stairs toward his room. 

 

╋

 

“Even, this is fantastic,” Even listened to his Isak cheer, holding a letter that had then given him the opportunity to change his entire future. “You can’t say no to this.”

 

“Isak,” Even pleaded, helpless, “I can’t say yes.”

 

Isak sighed, sitting on Even’s bed beside him, “Why not? This could be really good.”

 

“It’s across the ocean, Isak. How can I say yes?”

 

Before Christmas, Even applied to a couple schools, having no intent of actually going to any of them outside of Oslo. He and Isak had a plan. Even would go to school in Oslo while Isak did his third year at Nissen. Then, once Isak graduated they would look at different schools and consider leaving Oslo.

 

“I’m stuck at Nissen for another year, Ev. You have this fantastic opportunity to spend time in another country. And it’s in America. You speak English really well and your mom has family there.”

 

“There are plenty of English speaking countries, not just America. And this school is in Oregon, my mom’s family lives in North Carolina which is on the complete opposite side of the country.”

 

“So?” Isak asked, exasperated and Even couldn’t think. He was conflicted and he wasn’t expecting Isak to react so encouragingly. 

 

He sighed, lying back against his pillows, “Fuck. I don’t know what to do. I know this could be really good, but I don’t want to leave you.”

 

Isak gave a sweet and sympathetic smile, “Baby, you’re not leaving me. I don’t want you to make this decision based on me. I want you to go because you want to go. Or I want you to stay because you want to stay. This could be really incredible, though.”

 

“I’ll think about it. I’m not making any decisions right now. I still have a while to decide.”

 

Isak smiled, leaning down to rest his cheek against Even’s shoulder, “Just promise me that if you turn it down, it’s because you don’t feel like it’s right. Don’t turn it down for me or anything else, okay?”

 

Even nodded, pressing his lips to Isak’s forehead, “I promise.”

 

“Pinkie promise.”

 

Even laughed, holding out his pinkie, “Always.”

 

They linked their pinkies with laughs and Isak shifted so he can face Even more properly, “I love you, you know? And I support you, even though this wasn’t really part of our plan. I still support you. One hundred percent.”

 

“Ja, I know. Thank you, Issy.”

 

They traded a few sticky pecks, letting the languidness of it shift to sloppy wet kisses. 

 

“I love you, Isak Valtersen.”

 

Isak grinned, curling into Even’s side with a blush. 

 

╋

 

“Fuck,” Isak cried, head thrown back as Even thrusted into him. Even fucking loved the sounds Isak made when they were having sex, whether it be rough or not. It was music to his ears, either way. 

 

And it didn’t matter how  _ vanilla  _ missionary position seemed to some couples, sex with Isak was incredible however they did it. 

 

In the midst of the heat in the room and the fast moving intimacy between the two boyfriends, Even only had the ability to think of one thing. 

 

That was Isak. And how much he’d miss him if he went through with this school acceptance in the states. 

 

His thrusts slowed, losing steam as his mind and body were taken over by grief. The hard and fast movements turned to slow and deep, making Isak’s sounds seem louder and more prominent than before. 

 

Even pushed his lips against Isak’s, asking and begging for reassurance. 

 

He immediately felt better when Isak’s hands found Even’s hair, carding through it carefully. 

 

“I love you. God, fuck, I love you, Ev,” Isak groaned, bucking his hips and pulling Even closer by the shoulders. 

 

Even easily went, burying his face in Isak’s neck while he continued rocking his pelvis into his pliant boyfriend. His lip was between his teeth as he tried not to think of the future - one minute at a time. 

 

And after they fell over the climactic edge together, Even had a hard time pulling out. He didn’t want to lose the feelings of closeness.

 

He panted into Isak’s neck for a few minutes as they both came down from their orgasmic highs. 

 

“Ev,” Isak mumbled, combing his fingers through Even’s hair and dusting them down his back. “Are you okay?”

 

Even couldn’t say anything. He could barely move. The only response he gave Isak was a kiss to his collarbone. Other than that, he remained still. He just lay in between Isak’s legs for a couple more minutes until his softness became uncomfortable in such a constricting place. 

 

He couldn’t care the Isak’s release was being squished between their stomachs or that, now having pulled out, his own was leaking out of Isak and onto his sheets. 

 

“Baby,” Isak tried again, pulling Even’s fringe off his forehead to leave a kiss there. “Will you say something? You’re scaring me. Did I do something wrong?”

 

The phrase and the genuine fear in Isak’s tone caught Even’s attention. It pulled him out of his muddled head and back to reality, as he lifted his head to meet worried green eyes. He hated seeing Isak upset in anyway. But he hated it more when he was the cause of it. He shook his head, “What? Of course not. You didn’t do anything wrong. You were perfect. Like always.”

 

“Then,” Isak sighed, pressing his lips together, “what’s wrong?”

 

Even smiled, leaning up to kiss Isak on the mouth, “Nothing, Issy. I’m fine.”

 

“I know you better than that.”

 

Even’s face fell, having expected Isak to say something like that but hoping he wouldn’t. 

 

“Can we talk later? I just want to be here with you.”

 

Isak frowned, “Then be  _ here  _ with me, Even.”

 

Even understood Isak’s wishes. He wanted Even to mentally be there with him, not just physically like Even was asking for. So, he nodded, “You’ve got me.”

 

They stared into each other’s eyes for a long while. Even watched Isak’s eyes roam around his face and chest, but when they settled on his blue eyes again, Even spoke. “I don’t want to leave you, Is. I love you so fucking much. And I don’t know if I can just up and leave you.”

 

“Is this about your letter?”

 

Even nodded. 

 

Then he watched the gears behind Isak’s eyes turn. He found it fascinating to watch Isak think, but in that moment he couldn’t focus on it. “I don’t want you to think about me, Even. We’ve done long distance before, who says we can’t do it again?”

 

“I don’t want to do it again, Isak. And it would be so different this time. I’d be halfway around the world. It wouldn’t be a simple train ride to you.”

 

Isak sighed, rolling them over so he was on top and Even lay below, a gross sticky mess still between them. “If I’m the only thing holding you back from going, then you need to go. I’m going to be right here when you get back, Ev. And fuck, we can still see each other. We can facetime and Snapchat. And for Christmas you can fly home and for your birthday I can fly to you. It won’t be as easy as it’s been these last few months, but we can do it.”

 

Even hummed but didn’t say anything, just rubbed his boyfriend’s back and listened. 

 

“This is a once in a lifetime opportunity, Even. Why don’t you just take the leap?”

 

“I’m scared. What if I don’t like it?”

 

“Then at least you tried,” Isak gave a small smile, leaning down to leave a kiss on Even’s chin. “Two semesters. You could start with two semesters. I’ll be at Nissen still, but maybe I could get a job and save up for a plane ticket.”

 

The older rolled his lip between his teeth, “And what if… What I have an episode?”

 

“Is this the real reason you’re so hesitant?” Isak asked, and Even knew his silence would be answer enough. He watched Isak nod, those gears still turning. “You’re more than your illness, Even, and you know that. I can tell you that a million times - I probably have - but until you believe it, nothing that you’re feeling is going to change. So, let’s talk about this because it’s important,” Isak explained, sitting up more with his hands resting on Even’s sides.

 

“Right now?”

 

Isak nodded, but as he observed their current state, covered in their own substances. Even watched as he scrunched up his nose, making his signature face of disgust, “Maybe we can talk in the shower?”

 

Even offered a half grin, filled with amusement, despite the conversation he was dreading. He nodded, though, patting Isak’s thigh as a sign to let him up and Isak shifted, stepping off the bed. 

 

“Okay, I’m moving quickly,” Isak called over his shoulder as he ran for the bathroom. Even laughed, knowing Isak hated the feeling of not getting cleaned up immediately after sex. 

 

He got up to follow, finding Isak already in the shower with warm water running. 

 

Even stepped in with him, sidled up close behind him, “You always make me feel better.”

 

Even knew Isak’s smile turned into a grin, just by the tone in his voice, “Of course I do. What else am I good for?”

 

Even huffed a laugh and Isak bent over to grab the washcloth hanging over the side of the tub. He then used it to wipe away the stickiness on his stomach before turning around to clean Even’s, too. He wrang out the towel before adding a little body wash onto it, starting the cleansing process over again. Only that time, he washed all of Even’s body. And Even couldn’t help but hum at the feeling. It was one of the biggest perks to showering together.

 

“You should say yes, Ev,” Isak said, catching Even’s attention. “You have this wanderlust in you and I know you’ll regret it if you don’t accept.”

 

Even stared, feelings stirring inside of him - some good, but most of them were quite negative.

 

“You deserve to live a life that’s normal,” Isak mumbled, running the washcloth up and down Even’s arm. Even watched Isak’s brows dip and his jaw shift as he thought. “Do you have an illness that can really scary to handle? Yes. Would you being halfway across the world heighten those scared feelings if something were to happen? Yes. But, Even, I don’t want you to live in fear. And I know you don’t want that for yourself, either. If the situation was reversed, I know you’d encourage me to go for it. I won’t let you being bipolar stop you from something that can be so fucking incredible.”

 

Blue eyes blinked slow as green eyes met them, a pregnant silence settled between them until Isak broke it.

 

“I can’t force you to do it, Even. But, I’m going to encourage you to. Even though we both know I’m going to be a mess when goodbyes come. But at least you be able to say you did something really fucking cool.”

 

Even nodded, smiling at his boyfriend, “I’ll call tomorrow. Maybe somebody there can talk me through some things.”

 

Isak grinned, leaning in to smack a kiss on Even’s cheek. “It’ll be great. I’m excited for you.”

 

Even hummed, pulling Isak in for a real kiss, “It’s only been thirty seconds since I made the decision and I already miss you.”

 

“You’re a fucking sap,” Isak snickered. 

 

Even didn’t care though. Because he knew Isak was right. He really was a sap. 

 

Their kisses naturally steamed up, earning the attention of their bare lower halves as they slid against each other. Even panted a moan. 

 

And with a teasing smile and a slow grind against Even’s hips, Isak asked, “Round two?”

 

Even a bit exhausted, Even couldn’t say no to Isak when he was looking at him like  _ that _ . Especially when he was just as turned on as he was tired. 


	2. onsdag - august

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello hello!! 
> 
> Thank you for leaving some love on the first update of this story!!❤️
> 
> Here’s some things to know: 
> 
> I’ve decided that chapter titles will follow the same pattern as That’s All I Really Know, where it’s titled the day of the week the chapter is happening on but it will include the month, as well. Also, I am going to have the Norwegian day/month when the setting is in Norway and English day/month when the setting is in America. And the school Even is going to is in Oregon, as it says, and in my mind I’m picturing more of a University of Oregon setting, but for the most part, it will be fictional with some allusions to the UoO campus. 
> 
> I’ll be sure to let you know of any other important things to know❤️ Thanks so much for reading and I hope you are ready for this new adventure!! Xx 
> 
> Happy happy reading lovelies ❤️❤️❤️

“Hey, man,” Yousef greeted, hugging Even. 

 

Even smiled widely, “Halla. How’ve you been?”

 

Yousef nodded, “I’ve been good. I just got back from Turkey and have been spending time catching up with everyone.”

 

“Yeah? How was it? I bet you had a great time. Although, I’m glad you’re back, man,” Even clapped him on the back. They were standing around Even’s backyard with a farewell banner hanging on the fence and tables of food lining the perimeter. 

 

The goodbye party was Vilde’s idea, which Even’s mom easily supported and helped execute. And it just so happened to be on Even’s last night in Oslo. His flight was the next afternoon. 

 

“I had a great time, thanks,” Yousef sighed, smirking over at Even. “Not that it matters much, though: you’re on your way out of here.”

 

Even nodded, “I know. It’s so weird, but I’m excited, really.”

 

“You’ve always been one to chase after new adventures, that’s for sure.”

 

“Yeah. What’s unreal about this whole thing is how… right it feels?” Even said, the comment coming out as a question. He’d been finding it more and more difficult to voice his thoughts as the day of his departure came closer. “It’s going to be hard leaving, but I think it’ll be a good experience.”

 

Yousef nodded, “Absolutely, Even. I completely agree with you.” Even watched Yousef’s eyes travel and shift around the room, realization striking as they popped back to Even’s gaze, “How’s your family handling it all?”

 

“Good. Elle taking the worst, I think, though.”

 

“Well, of course. You’re her big brother.”

 

Even nodded, “Yeah. I’m going to miss her. Even though we fight sometimes.”

 

“All siblings fight, Ev. And besides, you and Elle are much nicer to each other than the vast majority of siblings are,” Yousef joked, nudging Even’s side. 

 

Even smiled. 

 

“And how's Isak?”

 

Even shrugged, “I don’t know, to be honest. He’s holding a lot of things in, I can tell.” He sighed, turning around and letting his line of vision immediately land on the younger boy. Isak was laughing with Eva and Noora about something. Things seemed good, but Even knew Isak had built a dam. And that dam was due to come crashing down. 

 

He didn’t want to pressure Isak with talking about his feelings, but he was beginning to worry as each day passed. He wished Isak would just open up and talk about things as they came up. Though, he knew the younger boy simply wasn’t like that. He’d gotten better at expressing his feelings over the years and Even could definitely give him credit for that. 

 

“Have you tried talking to him about it?”

 

Even shook his head, “I don’t want to force him into anything, you know?”

 

Yousef nodded, “I know exactly what you mean. Sana and I have been talking more lately, but… she can be so distant and I don’t know what to do.”

 

“Just be there,” Even advised, giving a small smile. They watched together as Sana approached Isak, Eva and Noora. Isak embraced her in a tight hug. 

 

They’d gotten closer over the previous months and it made Even feel so good inside. He knew they were some of the best people out there, so he was happy they were in his life. Not only that, but he was happy they were in  _ each other’s  _ lives.

 

“There will be days when she won’t say much of anything and others where she won’t be able to stay quiet,” Even explained. “Isak and Sana are similar in that way. Sana may be a little less chatty than Isak, but it’s still the same principle. You’re going to get every variation of moods and tempers from Sana the more you talk to her and get to know her as more than Elias’ sister. You’ll start seeing  _ everything _ .”

 

“I knew you were soft, but I didn’t know you were  _ this _ soft, Ev,” Yousef chuckled, nudging Even’s side with his elbow. 

 

Even laughed, going back to watching Isak as he seemed to be in deep conversation with Sana, “I can't help it, I guess.”

 

“Even though you’re leaving, Isak is going to be okay,” Yousef said, putting a hand on Even’s shoulder. 

 

Even nodded, “I know.”

 

=

 

The evening went on longer than Even was expecting. And so many more people showed up than he was anticipating. He hugged them all tightly, thanking them and wishing them the best while he would be away. They wished him all the same. 

 

And Mikael gave him a brand new journal. It was really nice and expensive for what it was. Mikael was his only friend that knew he wrote in a journal everyday.

 

The entire night was sort of sad but it was filled with everyone Even loved. There was food and music. And  _ dancing.  _

 

Even fucking loved dancing. And since Isak came out, Even’s life was much more saturated in slow dancing with his boyfriend. It was a dream. 

 

Even at parties, he could convince Isak to dance with him. It became a sentiment in their relationship. 

 

But what Even loved the most was dancing in slow circles in his backyard, his boyfriend pressed against him with their friends and family surrounding them. Even wasn’t concerned with what anyone was doing, he just liked that they were near. He liked that they were all there because they shared a common admiration for Even. 

 

And that really got to Even’s heart. He felt very loved. 

 

Isak hummed against Even’s neck, kissing his skin once before pulling back to meet his blue eyes, “Are you having fun?”

 

Even nodded, “I am. Are you?”

 

Isak smiled, “As much as I can be.”

  
  
  


=

 

“I’ve been doing a lot of research about Oregon,” Isak mumbled, folding Even’s clothes into different piles as he sat cross legged on the bed.

 

Even hummed as he packed up his carry on luggage, “Oh, yeah?”

 

He’d expected Isak to do research about the place. Isak researched  _ everything _ . 

 

“Uh huh,” Isak affirmed, placing a sweater on the top of a pile. “It’s rainy there. It doesn’t snow much, but I read that it’s the icy kind of cold in the winter, like chilling. So, you should take all of your sweaters and hoodies. Long pants. Socks.”

 

Even turned toward Isak with an amused look, completely entertained by his boyfriend - his sweet, thoughtful, concerned boyfriend.

 

“Also, they’ve legalized recreational marijuana there.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

Isak nodded, not looking up at Even, “I just want you to be safe. And I want you to know what you’re getting into, you know? More like  _ I _ want to know what you’re getting into, but still. I want you to be safe. I know you’re not going to like fuck around and smoke, but.” Isak sighed, his whole body crouching with it. 

 

Even paused his packed to watch Isak fold a pair of jeans, starting a new stack of clothing. 

 

He thought deeply as he watched and studied Isak. 

 

“There’s also a lot of places to explore there. It’s quite the tourist attraction, the whole state. It’s got everything: the ocean, a huge ass river, mountains and trees. It has big cities but also small towns that are apparently ‘ _ adorable _ .’ I read that somewhere,” Isak rambled, still keeping his eyes downcast, paying attention only to what his hands were doing.

 

He wouldn’t say it out loud, but he quite enjoyed when Isak got so stuck in his ramblings, only being able to focus his visual attention on the task at hand. He studied each movement the younger boy made and he watched him carefully place each folded article onto a designated pile. 

 

Isak sighed, and Even watched him do that, too. The sigh brought Isak’s attention away from the clothing, glancing up at Even to meet his already watchful gaze.

 

His rested mouth turned into a sad smile, “This is going to suck, huh?”

 

Even frowned, crawling onto the bed beside his distressed boy, “Issy.”

 

“No… I mean, I know this is going to be so fucking cool for you, but it’s going to suck not having you here. I’ve gotten used to you being so close to me all the time.”

 

“We’ll still talk and see each other.”

 

Isak nodded, curls escaping from behind his ear. It had been too long since he got a haircut. Isak complained about it often. But, whenever Even asked why he didn’t just get it cut, Isak would laugh and say he was too lazy. Even secretly liked it long, though. It reminded him of when they were kids and Isak’s curls were always an uncontrollable mess. “I’m not discouraging you, okay? I’m actually very excited for you, you know that I am.”

 

Even smiled, pressing a kiss to Isak’s head, running his fingers through his long curls, “I know, baby. And I’m not taking any of this as you being less than supportive. You have a right to be sad, Is.”

 

Isak turned fully toward Even water lining his eyes, “I am sad. I’ve never been more simultaneously excited and sad about anything in my entire life. I just love you a lot and I’m going to miss you so much.”

 

Smile still on his lips, Even pulled Isak in for a firm kiss, “I’ll miss you, too. But we have trips planned, baby. We’ll see each other, okay? You only have to wait two and half months to visit me.”

 

Isak nodded, leaning into Even’s embrace with his head nuzzled into his neck, “Two and half months is a long time.”

 

“Ten weeks or so. We can do it,” Even hummed, running his hand up and down Isak’s back. He only had two days before he left and he didn’t intend to spend them dwelling on the negatives. 

 

He sighed, squeezing his boyfriend tightly, before pulling away enough to look into sad green eyes, “You’ve been researching so much about Oregon, but you want to know something about Oslo?”

 

“Hmm?” 

 

Even smiled, tilting his head to the side trying to encourage a smile from Isak, “All of the most important things to me are in Oslo. And I think it’s the perfect city to take care of the love of my life while I’m away.”

 

Isak bit his lip as his eyes smiled softly. Isak had yet to cry about Even’s nearing departure, but both boys knew it was coming. 

 

And Even knew it was going to hurt to see. Isak’s tears were going to claw at Even’s chest and beg for him to stay. Even wasn’t ready to see Isak cry like that, so he just soothed Isak.

 

He got him to lie down on the bed, curled into his chest with even breaths and drooping eyes. 

 

“Sleep, Issy,” Even whispered as his boyfriend’s weight grew heavier against him, a sure sign Isak was falling asleep. 

 

And it wasn’t until Even was sure that Isak was asleep that he moved. He got up and finished packing, putting clothes into suitcases and zipping up his carry on. 

 

He took the bags out of the room to leave by the front door and while he was upstairs, he found his family sitting together in the living room. 

 

He smiled at them, his heart feeling joy as he thought of the love he has for them. He was going to miss them so much. 

 

His mom looked over at him with a growing smile, although it was a bit sad. A bittersweet expression, “Are you all packed up?”

 

Even nodded, “Yeah, I think so.”

 

“How are you feeling?” His dad encouraged, and Even was grateful he had his parents. 

 

“I’m feeling good, but that answer might be different in the morning.”

 

He watched his parents nod, noticing how Elle was seemingly trying to ignore the conversation, hugging a pillow to her chest as she stared ahead of her. 

 

“Is Isak staying tonight?” 

 

Even’s eyes settled on his mother again, “Yeah, he’s already asleep. He’s going with us to the airport, tomorrow.”

 

Elle huffed out a breath following Even’s answer as she got up, walked across the room to give Even a hug, “I’ll see you in the morning. Goodnight, Even.” 

 

With that, Even and his parents watched her stomp up the stairs toward her room. 

 

“She’ll be fine,” Even’s dad said, causing Even to nod. 

 

“I know. Anyway, I’m going to go back downstairs and finish up a few things.”

 

“Goodnight,” his parents offered, to which Even returned before heading downstairs again. 

 

When he got to his doorway, all he could do was stop and stare at the beautiful boy sleeping peacefully in his bed. 

 

He felt a number of things as he watched Isak occasionally shift or scrunch up his nose. 

 

He used that time to sit at his desk for the last time for a while and open his journal. He picked up his pen and started writing about the love of his life and what was to come. 

  
  


_ … I’m not afraid of what America has to offer me. I’m afraid of what America  _ can’t  _ offer me. It can’t offer me my parents or Elle. It can’t offer me my friends. And it can’t offer me Isak. God, I feel like a mess when it comes to Isak. I always want to do right by him and I worry everyday that it’s not enough. I don’t want him to feel lonely while I’m away. And honestly, I’m afraid of how my absence will impact him. He already has a fucked up sleeping schedule, a hard childhood and is going into his third year. He doesn’t need to worry about his bipolar boyfriend being more than seven thousand kilometers away. He’s not my babysitter, but maybe I need a fucking babysitter. I think America will be great, but I worry, you know? I’m never going to not worry about home while I’m there. Especially Isak. He’s my home, after all… _

 

“Ev?”

 

Even looked over his shoulder at Isak who was then awake and sitting upright. He smiled, closing his journal, “Hey, I’m done. Let’s go to sleep.”

 

He slipped his pants off, leaving him in a T-shirt and boxers before helping Isak out of his jeans, knowing he hates sleeping in jeans. 

 

Or pants, in general. 

 

When things settled, Even climbed into bed beside Isak, spooning him from behind, “Goodnight, baby.”

 

“Goodnight,” Isak whispered back, sounding a little sad as he held Even’s hand to his chest. 

 

And Even would be a fool if he said they didn’t hold each other tighter than usual. 


	3. torsdag - august

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Third week of August.   
> Even leaves Oslo.

Even had been trying to speak more English the previous months to prepare for his time in the states. His mother was a big help there. Though, being away from constant English made her a little rusty at times, but Even had other help, too. He conversed with Mr. Johnson via email as well as the administrator he’d been working with at the American university he’d attend.

 

It all made Even very excited, but part of going to America was leaving Norway and everything he knew. He was to say goodbye to everything and everyone. 

 

And saying goodbye fucking sucked.

 

He’d said his goodbyes to his friends already. It was bittersweet. They were all really happy for him. 

 

Yet, Even wasn’t prepared for how awful saying goodbye to his family would be. 

 

His mother cried and his father just gave him a saddened look. They were both hopeful and happy for him, but he knew exactly how much they were going to miss him. He’d miss them just the same. 

 

Maybe even more.

 

Elle. 

 

Fuck. Saying goodbye to Elle was a lot more difficult than Even anticipated. She looked so sad and her tear streaked cheeks were no help to Even’s mood. 

 

He held her tightly, her face pressed against his chest as she cried, “I’m going to miss you.”

 

Even hummed, pressing a kiss to the top of her hair. She was one of his best friends. There was no way he wouldn’t miss her. Even sighed, rubbing her back, “You’ll be okay without me. Isak will take care of you.” He made eye contact with his boyfriend who was standing a few feet away. And Isak gave a sad smile, nodding to confirm that  _ yes, don’t worry. I’ll take care of her.  _

 

It hurt Even to see Isak’s eyes red from tears, but he knew everything would be okay. 

 

Though, no part of him was prepared for how heartbreakingly challenging actually saying goodbye to Isak would be as he released Elle from his embrace and took two strides to his boy. 

 

Isak wrapped his arms around Even’s middle, burrowing his face in his neck. And Even could tell by his breathing that he was trying not to cry. 

 

Leading up to Even’s departure, Isak spent nearly every waking moment with him. A week before Even was to leave, Isak slept at Even’s house every night as they whispered about the future and made love. 

 

And maybe those moments were really what made Even so fucked. Because he knew that those moments would become memories until he saw Isak again. 

 

Holding Isak close in the middle of the airport had to be one of the most heart wrenching moments of Even’s  _ life _ . Isak’s face was pressed to Even’s neck with his arms tightly wrapped around his shoulders. Even felt a few kisses against his skin before Isak pulled back, looking into Even’s eyes with a few streaking tears. 

 

And Isak looked fucked. And Even knew it was finally hitting Isak that Even was  _ leaving _ . 

 

Even didn’t think he’d ever seen Isak so destroyed. 

 

“I love you,” Isak whispered and it tore into Even’s heart. 

 

“Baby,” Even mumbled, pressing their foreheads together. “Fuck. I’m going to miss you. I love you so much.”

 

He watched Isak gently shut his eyes, soaking up all of the closeness that will only last for a few more minutes. “Don’t forget about me, okay?” Isak joked, trying to lighten the situation. Even appreciated the effort, but he saw all the pain and tears behind Isak’s front.

 

“I could never.”

 

“You’ll call me when you land?”

 

“Of course, I will,” Even said, pressing a firm kiss to Isak’s forehead. He ran his hand through Isak’s hair, settling at the back of his neck to pull him in for a real kiss. 

 

It was soft and sweet. Not only were they in public, but Even’s family was standing there watching them. 

 

Isak pulled away first, looking into Even’s eyes, more tears gathering around emerald orbs. 

 

“Isak,” Even sighed sadly, feeling his heart clench in his chest. 

 

“I’m okay,” Isak insisted, wiping his hands down his face. 

 

“You better go, Even. You don’t want to miss your flight,” Even dad said from behind them. 

 

Even nodded, turning to give his family one more round of hugs and farewells. He picked up his carry on and swung it over his shoulder as he looked at Isak one last time. 

 

“I love you. And I’ll see you soon, okay?”

 

Isak nodded quickly, rubbing his nose with the back of his hand. And all Even could think is how much he was going to miss Isak’s little mannerisms. 

 

Even hooked his hand around Isak’s head for one more firm kiss, which turned into three more firm kisses. He whispered against Isak’s lips a quiet, “Bye, baby.”

 

And Isak whispered back, a sad and soft, “Bye.”

 

A final kiss on Isak’s mouth and one more on his cheek before he waved to the four most important people in his life as he walked away. 

 

When glanced back at the end of the terminal, he saw his mom standing next to Isak. She was holding his hand with hers and her other hand was on his arm. Elle was behind them, leaning into their dad’s side. 

 

And he was happy to know they had each other’s support. 

 

It wasn’t until Even had boarded the plane and taken his seat that he realized how  _ big _ this was. He was moving to a different country. Halfway across the world. 

 

While he still had service, he opened his texts, finding one from Isak. 

 

_ My Baby❤️ _

_ ……… _

_ Fuck.  _

_ I already miss you.  _

 

_ I love you so much, Is.❤️ _

 

_ I love you. I’m  _

_ sitting in the car with  _

_ your family and I’m  _

_ just trying not to cry.  _

_ I hate emotions.  _

 

_ I know you do, lol.  _

_ But it’s okay. You can cry. _

_ Nobody will judge you too _

_ harshly, I don’t think.  _

 

_ I wish you could  _

_ just hold me. Fuck.  _

_ Am I being unsupportive? _

 

_ Never❤️ I miss you, too.  _

 

_ ❤️❤️❤️  _

_ I’m already counting  _

_ down the days for  _

_ when I see you next.  _

 

Can’t wait x

I’m taking off now. 

I’ll call you when I land. 

I love you. 

 

I love you, Even. 

Have a safe flight.

 

❤️

 

❤️

 

………

 

Even was lucky enough to have a window seat. Flying always exhilarated him. Taking off made butterflies flap in his stomach as a grin grew on his face. 

 

He turned his phone to airplane mode and watched out the window as the wheels lifted from the ground and the plane was off to a new destination. 

 

He was lucky to have a window seat. Flying always exhilarated him and taking off let butterflies loose in his belly. 

 

Tucked right inside his backpack was the new journal Mikael had given him. Even decided he wanted to start a brand new journal for the time he was in the states. He pulled out his favorite pen and opened to the first page of the journal. 

 

His hand started writing as the plane cruised through the sky,

 

_ It’s weird to think that I’m already at this point of leaving Norway. Part of me thought I’d never leave this place apart from trips and traveling. It’s everything I know and hold everything I love. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t excited for what I’ll experience in the next months, but I will miss home.  _

 

_ I wonder about everything concerning this new chapter of my life. Mostly social things. Like if I’ll like my roommate. If my roommate will like  _ me _. I worry that I won’t make friends and I worry about professors and classes. Maybe everyone worries about these things though. I hope they pass by, the worries.  _

 

_ I worry about leaving my family. I hope Dad keeps having success at work, but not too much to the point where he isn’t home. I hope Mom learns to bake that sweet bread she’s been thinking about and I hope she learns to love her job again.  _

 

_ I worry about Elle. I hope she gets through school with good grades and even better friends. I hope she isn’t too sad that I’m going away for a while. She knows I’ll be back.  _

 

_ I worry that Isak and I won’t talk much. We have two trips planned to see each other, but I worry they’ll fall through and we won’t. I worry that while I’m so far away he’ll meet someone. That might be a little irrational - I trust him and I know him. But still, I worry. I think of myself as the lucky one. I’m not really sure how I managed to have Isak, but he’s incredible. I love him. So much.  _

 

_ Sometimes I think about how we got together and I can’t help but wonder where we’d be had it not turned out. I guess it’s good I won’t find out.  _

 

_ But anyway, Isak gets sad sometimes. He doesn’t tell people, but I see it. He can’t hide it from me. Like this morning. He tried being loud and happy while I grabbed last minute things to get ready to leave, but I could tell. I could see right through him.  _

 

_ And holding him in the airport. Fuck. I hope he realizes how much I miss him. And it hasn’t even been half an hour. Though, I keep telling myself that he’ll be fine.  _

 

_ Elle will be fine. So will Mom and Dad. The boys will be fine.  _

 

_ Oslo will be fine.  _

  
  



	4. thursday - august

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Portland, Oregon.  
> Third week of August.  
> Even stays with a host family for the evening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t have too much to say, other than me always wanting to express my gratitude. I love you all so much and am thankful for you and your support. 
> 
> You are loved. And you are valuable. ❤️ 
> 
> Happy reading, lovers Xx

“Ladies and gentlemen, as we start our descent, please make sure your seat backs and tray tables are in their full upright position,” the stewardess says over the speakers throughout the plane. “Make sure your seat belt is securely fastened and all carry-on luggage is stowed underneath the seat in front of you or in the overhead bins.”

 

Even was glad to be landing. He’d had two short layovers which helped break up the monotony if flying. He did enjoy flying, but after the prolonged hours of being on the plane, he was getting too antsy.

 

He shoved his backpack between his legs as he leaned toward the window, watching as the clouds grew closer and closer until they surrounded the view. Even waited, watching patiently as the white fluff began to clear, displaying beautiful scenery.

 

There were so many colors and his eyes were catching on every tree in sight. The sky was a grey toned blue, but it was still happy.

 

Even was giddy as they fly right over a mass of water, he looked at the docks and the tiny boats zipping by. His cheeks hurt from smiling so much.

 

The place was _beautiful_. He knew Norway was a beautiful place, but Oregon had already proven to hold similar beauty and he wasn’t even on the ground yet.

 

And as the plane touched down, shaking up the entire cabin, Even felts a relief. He wanted to call Isak and his family. He wanted to stretch his legs. He wanted to get his bags and leave the airport as soon as he could. He was growing more and more antsy.

 

He forced himself to slow down, though as the people around him tried to race of the plane, only creating a “traffic jam” out of each other.

 

Even turned the data on his phone back on letting a few notifications come in. He wasn’t concerned about any of them except the one from his boyfriend and the one from his host for the evening.

 

He had gotten in touch with a family through the university and they were going to pick him up from the airport, let him stay the evening in their home and then they’d take him to the university campus the next morning. They also had a son who was going to the university, as well.

 

The text was simple, letting Even know they were on their way and were excited to have his company for the evening.

 

Before opening Isak’s message, Even got up since the line to get off the plane was flooding out the doors more smoothly. He grabbed his things as he followed suit.

 

When he was finally off the plane and on the solid ground of the Portland airport, he took a deep breath that felt surreal. He was in a different country, all by himself. And he was so _ready_ for his life here to be good.

 

To be great.

 

And new.

 

He wasn’t sure where to go, so he followed the crowd. Which worked out great as Even quickly found baggage claim, watching the belt drag around everyone’s luggage. When he saw his, he reached for the strap before finding the exit doors.

 

He sent a quick text to his host family before sitting down on a nearby bench. The jet lag was finally settling in Even’s body. It was already ten o’clock at night in Portland. And to Even’s body it was seven in the morning, just as it was in Oslo.

 

He didn’t sleep much in the plane, mostly due to turbulence and his layover in Chicago.

 

His body was starting to feel it though.

 

After letting himself come down from the feeling of being on the plane, he opened Isak’s message. It was sent at almost 03:00, Oslo time.

 

_My Baby❤️_

_………_

 

_I can’t sleep and so_

_naturally I’m lying_

_here thinking of you._

_I miss you already._

_I know you’re gonna_

_have a kickass time in_

_America and I’m excited_

_for you. I’m very impatiently_

_waiting for you to land so_

_I can get that phone call_

_and hear your voice. Be safe x._

 

_I’ve landed. I don’t want_

_to wake you, so I’m not_

_going to call right now. But_

_I love you. How about you_

_call me when you_

_wake up?❤️_

 

_………_

 

Even smiled down at Isak’s text. He was really lucky to have such a sweet boyfriend. And he was even more pleased to note he only had to wait approximately forty more minutes until he’d be able to talk to him.  
  
Even hoped Isak had actually fallen asleep and even though he wanted to talk to him, as well, he knew that for every minute he waited for Isak to call him, Isak was getting rest. He was happy to know that Isak wasn’t yet awake.

 

He did worry about his sleeping in the coming weeks, but not then. Silence was his answer.

 

He was happy he didn’t have to spend the rest of the night by himself. Before Even left, Isak said he’d be up early, expecting his call. But, Even knew better than to wake Isak when he was sleeping.

 

His phone rang with a hum and he answered it in English at the sight of the American phone number. He recognized it as the host mother’s number.  
  
“Hello?”  
  
“Hi. Is this Even?”  
  
“It is, hi.”  
  
The female voice on the other end was gentle as she seemed to smile through the phone, “This is Carla. Have you found your bags and everything okay?”  
  
Even nodded, standing with his luggage, “I did. Do you want me to meet you?”  
  
“We’re actually inside by baggage claim, where are you at?”

 

“By the doors. But I can come to you.” Even began rolling his bags behind him as he walked back toward the conveyor belts of travelers’ luggage.

 

He saw a blonde woman one the phone standing beside a younger guy. He guessed that was them as he said to Carla over the phone, “I think I see you.”

 

The blonde woman glanced up, smiling at Even who was approaching her, “You’ve found us.” She hangs up the phone, walking excitedly toward Even with her arms open wide. “It’s so nice to meet you, Even,” she said and it was comforting. It was a warm embrace and though Even had never met her before, he could feel the natural nurturer she was.

 

“It’s nice to meet you. Thank you for picking me up and letting me stay with you,” Even speaks as they pull away. He’s only slightly self conscious about his accent, but Carla doesn’t seem to bat an eye at it.

 

“Of course. We’re happy to have you. How was the flight?”

 

Even shrugs a little, “It’s was good, but long.”

 

“Oh, I’m sure,” Carla smiles. “Let me introduce you to my son,” she perks up, turning toward the guy who was with her.

 

He was definitely around Even’s age. He had dark brown hair and light eyes along with freckles over his nose and cheeks.

 

“This is Noah.”

 

Noah nodded, offered a smile and held his hand out for Even to shake.

 

Even accepted, shaking his hand with a tighter smile than the one Logan gave, “Even.”

 

“It’s nice meeting you. My mom has been talking about you nonstop for the last month, so.”

 

Even chuckled, not sure how to respond, so he settled on, “Well, I’m happy to be here. Happy to be off the plane, really.”

 

Logan’s smile grew, “Don’t get too excited. You, my friend, are gonna be bunking with me tonight.”

 

“That can’t be so bad,” Even joked back as the three of them started walking to the exit.

 

___

 

After getting Even’s bags inside and meeting Carla’s husband, Jeff, Noah took the lead, showing Even to their room for the night.

 

“Here we are,” Noah said as the door swung open. It revealed a bedroom that screamed _Teenage boys live here_. The cleanliness of the floor and the two pristinely made twin sized beds didn’t seem to match the chaotic display of posters and collectables around the room.

 

“I love it,” Even commented with a grin as Noah sat down on one of the beds.

 

“It’s not much. My brother officially moved out at the beginning of the year and we haven’t done anything with his stuff, yet. So, it’s still not really _my_ room, you know?”

 

Even nodded, sitting on the opposite bed, “Have you two shared your whole life?”

 

Noah shrugged, bobbing his head, “Yeah. It’s always been okay, though. We get along.”

 

“How far apart in age are you two?”

 

“He’s almost two years older than me. What about you, any siblings?”

 

Even smiled, thinking of Elle, “A sister. Almost six years younger.”

 

“I can’t even imagine. Did you ever feel… _lonely_? I mean, Jackson and I grew up being each other’s best friend. We always had each other to do stuff with.”

 

“Uh, I still had a best friend,” Even nodded, fiddling his thumbs in his lap, feeling a flush creep through him. It wasn’t often that Even blushed, but talking about Isak always made him a little bashful. “And now my best friend is the love of my life.”

 

Noah grinned, “You’re dating your childhood best friend?”

 

Even pressed his lips together before letting out a small laugh, “Yeah.”

 

“So, tell me about her?” Noah asked, pausing before tentatively adding, “Or… him?”

 

And though Even was unafraid of telling Noah he had a _boy_ friend, not a girlfriend, he was thankful for the extension, “Um, yeah. His name is Isak.”

 

“Isak?” Noah smiled as he slowly repeated the name, his brows dipped in slight confusion.

 

“Yeah.”

 

“I’ve never heard that name before. How do you spell that?”

 

Even chuckled, “I-S-A-K.”

 

“That’s cool,” Noah said, and he sounded very genuine about it.

 

“Yeah. You should meet him.”

 

Noad nodded, his whole body perking up with some level of excitement, “Yeah? I’d love to. Is he visiting while you’re here?”

 

“He’s coming in November.”

 

“Tell me about him.”

 

Even smiled, feeling his entire body melt in fondness. The relaxation he felt forced a yawn to the surface. He really was exhausted, but he wasn’t going to say anything to Noah about it. Plus, he was still waiting for Isak to call. “He’s really great. Smart as fuck, too. Way smarter than me. He’s stubborn and sarcastic. He’s kind of grumpy and that can come off a little strong, but I don’t know… I find it enearding.”

 

“Fuck, you’re like _really_ in love with him.”

 

“I have been for a long time.”

 

“How’d you know?”

 

“That I was into him?”

 

He nodded.

 

“Uh,” Even hummed, slipping his shoes off and pulling one foot up onto the bed so he could hug his knee while he and Noah spoke. “It was kind of ongoing. I had a couple different girlfriends, only one of them being any kind of serious, but at one point I’d ditch her all the time to hang out with Isak, even though he lived a couple hours from me. In the summer, he and his mom would stay with my family. And fuck, I don’t even know how it all happened, really. I just remember thinking how much I didn’t want to be his friend. I wanted more.”

 

Noah looked at him in disbelief, “And it just worked out?”

 

“No, absolutely not. There was a lot of self loathing in there before I got the balls to tell him I liked him. He’s a bit younger than me and was just starting to go out with girls, which kind of intimidated me. Like, how could he ever like me? And looking back on it all, he never seemed that into any of the girls he was talking to, but at the time I didn’t see it that way. Finally, Sonja and I broke up and Isak and I started hanging out more. Then once I found enough courage to talk to him, it was smooth for a while. But we both have fucked up things in our lives, so no. It’s never just worked out. We’ve had to work our asses off for it to work between us,” Even sighed, resting his chin in the top of his knee.

 

He liked Noah. Things felt natural and easy with him. He felt like he could confide in him. And that was just the type of person Even needed while he was so far from home.

 

“But what about you? Dating anyone?” Even encouraged, wanting a small break from talking. English was a new muscle.

 

Noah hesitated and it was answer enough for Even.

 

“You don’t have to tell me,” Even said, trying to make Noah feel comfortable.

 

“I just… it’s weird.”

 

“Why do you think that?”

 

Noah shrugged, “Nobody knows, not even the closest people in my life.”

 

Even offered a smile, repeating, “You don’t have to tell me, but you _can_.”

 

After a moment of silence and studying Noah’s body language, Even decided he would chance the situation and push just a little. “Who are they?” He was careful to use nonspecific pronouns. He didn’t only do it because it’s a habit for himself to do so, but because he sensed Noah needed it.

 

“My parents don’t know. And I mean, it’s not really anything. We haven’t talked about it.”

 

“That’s okay.”

 

“His name is Logan. He’s from Florida but he goes to school with me. You’ll meet him, I’m sure. But we’ve been talking and I really like him.”

 

Even smiled, “I’m happy for you, Noah. I want to meet him. You don’t have to answer, but how come you haven’t told your parents?”

 

Noah shrugged, “I don’t know. It’s new and I’m just trying to figure it out for myself before I open up to them about this huge thing in my life. And like I said, Logan and I haven’t talked about what’s going on.”

 

“I understand that. Isak and I kept things quiet for a while and snuck around our parents’ backs. Isak took a lot longer to come out than I did. You’ve just got to go at your own pace. Don’t follow anyone’s timeline but your own.”

 

“That’s good advice,” Noah nodded, letting his body slouch a little. “I just worry, you know? Like… what if I’m more invested in this than he is?”

 

“Why do you say that?”

 

“I don’t know,” Even watched Noah’s expression grow sad and he really felt for him.

 

“Give it some time, Noah. Everything will work out the way it needs to.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

Wanting to lighten the conversation a little, Even perked up, “Do you have a picture of Logan?”

 

Noah smirked, pulling out his phone, “You want to see him?”

 

Even nodded with a huge grin, moving to sit beside Noah.

 

Noah tipped his phone in Even’s direction, showing him a picture of a charming looking boy. His smile was wide, he had very straight teeth and tanned skin. His hair was a little grown out and curly, like Isak’s, but it was a bit darker in color than Isak’s. Noah swiped his finger across the screen, showing Even a picture of the two boys together.

 

The ocean was in the background and Noah was tucked in close to Logan. They were bundled in jackets and they looked happy as Logan snapped the selfie of them.

 

“This was a couple hours away from here, in Seaside. We went there one day over spring break.”

 

“You two look great together,” Even smiled.

 

And then Even just listened. He listened to Noah tell him all about Logan and how they came to be. Even smiled the whole time, too. Despite being ecstatic for Noah, though, Even couldn’t help but miss Isak when seeing the picture of the two of them together and hearing Noah talk about how excited Noah was to see logan the next day. They had been apart since the semester ended, but tomorrow they would be reunited.

 

It was as if Isak could tell how much Even’s thoughts were dwelling on him, Even’s phone rang with Isak’s face showing across the screen. He smiled wide, looking up at Noah with only half an apology on his face.

 

Noah laughed, “Answer it. I’m going to go shower and get ready for bed.”

 

Even thanked him before answering the phone, the Norwegian easily falling from his tongue, “Halla, baby. I miss you.”

 

“I miss you.”

 

“Are you just waking up?”

 

“Yeah. I’m still in bed. How was the flight?”

 

Even hummed, happy to be talking to his love, “It wasn’t bad. It was long. I felt like I’d never actually get here.”

 

Isak laughed and it made Even’s chest squeeze. “Well, I’m glad you’re safe. What time is it there?”

 

Even glanced at the clock, “Almost midnight.”

 

“Have you slept?”

 

“Baby, I love you, but you’ve got to stop worrying about me,” Even teased, but he knew what Isak was going to say.

 

“Impossible. And don’t act like you don’t worry about me.”

 

“You’re right.”

 

“So? Have you slept?”

 

“Nei. The plane was uncomfortable and I only landed a little more than an hour ago,” Even explains.

 

“Hopefully you’ll sleep really good then. How’s the family you’re staying with?”

 

Even smiled, “Really good, Isak. They have a son and we’ve just been hanging out since we got back to the house. He’s cool. I think you’d like him.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“He wants to meet you.”

 

“You talked about me?” Isak toned turned to a tease and it made Even’s heart race a little.

 

Even hummed, “I’m always talking about you, Issy.”

 

“I love you.” Even could hear the smile in Isak’s voice and he couldn’t help but mirror it, along with the sentiment.

 

“I love you, too.”

 

They chatted for a minute more about Isak’s plans for the day. He was going to go to the skatepark with Jonas before his mom was going to drag him to go shopping for some new clothes.

 

“I’m a fucking third year, now. I don’t need my mom taking me shopping for school clothes.”

 

Even grinned, “Are you sure? Are you capable of doing things like that for yourself?”

 

Isak laughed loudly, sending chills down Even’s spine, “Fuck you, Even.”

 

“I wish,” Even tsked back as Noah entered the room again. He was wearing sweats and a T-shirt. His hair was also soaked.

 

“Don’t even tease. The boys were giving me so much shit yesterday about that fucking hickey you gave me the other day. I fucking hate when you give me hickeys in visible places, Ev. But now… fuck. Now, I’d give anything to have you with me right now, sucking hickeys into my neck.”

 

Even snickered, “Don’t worry, baby. I’ll save them up and litter every inch of your skin in hickeys when I see you.”

 

“Good thing red is my color,” Isak teased and it sent Even’s mine on a path through an Isak-centered ocean.

 

Even imagined Isak to be stretching out in his bed, maybe wearing one of the hoodies he left behind for him. He could almost see Isak’s messy bedhead, curls aloof and flying everywhere, and maybe he has a pillow mark pressed into his cheek. His mouth grew into a soft smile as he thought about his sweet boyfriend.

 

“Well, you should probably sleep, Ev,” Isak said, his voice hardly above a mumble.

 

“Okay.”

 

Isak sighed, “Let me know how things go tomorrow? I know you’ll probably be busy, so I don’t expect you to call.”

 

“I’ll try. I’ll at least text, okay?”

 

“Okay. Sleep well, Even.”

 

Even licked his lips, rolling his shoulders to relax a little. He was trying to ignore Noah to have a private farewell with his boyfriend. Noah was only a few feet away from him, scrolling through his phone as he rested in his bed. Even supposed the language barrier would have to be enough privacy for now, “Baby?”

 

Isak hummed in response.

 

“I just… I love you.”

 

“I love you, too. I already miss you so much.”

 

“Me too, but we’ll be fine.”

 

“Yeah, we will.”

 

Even breathed heavily, “Have a good day, Isak.”

 

“Thanks. Sleep well, Ev. Chat tomorrow?”

 

“Always,” Even smiles, feeling his chest fill with love.

 

“G’night,” Isak whispered and it seemed to be cue enough for the line to go dead.

 

Even rushed to get himself ready for bed and before he knew it, he was fast asleep in a new country.  
  
  



	5. friday - august

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Portland, Oregon ---> Eugene, Oregon  
> Third week of August  
> Noah and Even drive to University.  
> Isak makes Even emotional from half a world away.  
> (LOTS OF FLUFF, GOOD LUCK I LOVE YOU)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M GOING TO A MOVIE RN SO I DON'T HAVE TIME TO RIGHT A SWEET LITTLE MESSAGE RIGHT HERE.  
> BUT I LOVE YOU AND I'LL SEE YOU V SOON WITH SOME MOREEEEEE.  
> GOOD LUCK WITH THIS TOOTH ROTTING, HEARTWRENCHING FLUFF.  
> LOTS OF FEELINGS.
> 
> OKAY. BYEEE.
> 
> MUCH LOVE AND HAPPY READING!!<3333

The following morning, having showered and got ready for the day, Even was ready to go as he and Noah loaded up the car with their things and climbed in the driver and passenger seats.

 

Even initially thought Carla and Jeff were going to take them down to campus, but it turned out that Noah was going to drive them, leaving behind his home and his family.

 

“So, this is your second year at university?”

 

Noah nodded, “Yep. Same for you?”

 

Even shook his head, “I had to repeat my last year of high school.”

 

“Oh, yeah? How come?” Seeming to sense Even’s unease, Noah quickly said, “You don’t have to tell me.”

 

Even nodded, “Sorry, it’s just a big topic.”

 

“No worries,” Noah smiled.

 

“So, uh…” Even started, looking out the window before turning to face Noah more. “Are you seeing Logan soon?”

 

Immediately Noah blushed, giving a delayed nod, “He wants to have dinner tonight.”

 

“Does he?”

 

“Yeah. I mean, it’s been so casual between us, so this feels big.”

 

Even nodded, “It is big. That’ll be great, Noah.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

Just then, Even’s phone buzzed with a text.

 

_My Baby❤️_

_……..._

_Did you find my letter?_

 

_???_

 

_Hahaha, I put it in your backpack._

 

_I didn’t notice!_

 

_Look!!:)_

 

_………_

 

“That Isak?”

 

Even gave an affirming nod to Noah’s question as he reached into the back seat for his backpack. He should’ve expected Isak to leave him something. Because even though he would deny it, Isak was the softest little fuck and Even was immensely grateful to have him, always.

 

He started digging through his backpack, checking all the pockets and feeling between everything inside until his fingers found paper.

 

He pulled it out and there was an envelope with his name on it. The envelope wasn’t flat, he could tell there was something inside, which made him excited and the sloppy letters of Isak’s handwriting made Even feel light. Even often forgot how in love he was, but then he’ll find himself short of breath and grinning wide with an ache in his heart. He didn’t know how he could be so fucking endeared by four simple letters written in what some might call the most horrendous handwriting. But at the same time, he didn’t care.

 

“Is that from him?”

 

Even breathed a laugh through his nose, “Yeah. He snuck it in here before I left, I guess. That’s what he just texted me about.”

 

“Open it.”

 

Even did, pouring out the contents into his lap. He pulled the letter from the envelope, since it failed to fall out with the other objects.

 

He unfolded the neatly folded paper, thinking about how Isak was particular about paper being folded so the corners match up perfectly. He always teased him about it and when Isak would roll his eyes, preparing to go into a long monologue of _why paper needed to be folded that way_ Even would lean in and steal his words in form of a kiss.

 

_“I know, baby. I’m just teasing you,” Even would smile so widely at Isak that his cheeks would crinkle around his eyes._

 

_Isak would pretend to be angry for a few moments before cracking and melting right into his boyfriend._

 

_And Even would welcome him with tight squeezes and forehead kisses._

 

Even sighed, glancing over Isak’s letter. He wasn’t sure he’d ever seen so many of words strung together in written form that came from his boyfriend. He couldn’t help but smile as he started reading.

  


   _Hei, Even._

_This whole thing is about to get really fucking cheesy, but you and I both know you aren’t unfamiliar with cheesiness. You are actually the biggest sap that I’ve ever met, so you can’t tease me too much. I tell you all the time that I love you and that I’m grateful for you, but I have a hard time telling you the specifics. So, just bear with me while I try._

_I’ve been thinking about you going to school pretty much since you told me about the acceptance letter. It’s really one of the only things I think about lately… but I’m proud of you. There’s a lot of things I’m wishing for for you._

_I hope you learn everything you want to learn about while you’re away, whether that’s in or out of the classroom. I hope you meet new people that you’ll carry with you for a long long while. I hope you get to experience new things. I hope you’re at ease while you’re there. I hope you find someone or a few people that you can really rely on, since I won’t be with you. I hope you know how much I miss you already. (I miss you so much, despite you literally being asleep in my bed while I write this.)_

_But mostly, I hope you learn to see how fucking brave you are. Not everyone could up and move to a different country for x amount of time. I know that I couldn’t. I look up to you, Even. And I don’t tell you that enough, but I do. You’re charming and charismatic. You carry around this energy that makes everyone feel welcome and at home with you. Everyone you meet falls in love with you because, honestly, how can they not? You’re_ you.

_You’re strong and resilient. You’re caring and when you talk about things you’re passionate about, I feel like I can’t breathe because you’re so fucking beautiful when you talk about those things. Sometimes, especially lately, I’ll find myself just observing you. And maybe I’m a little biased, but I don’t think there’s a single flaw I see you._

_Last year was such a tough time for me with coming out and everything that happened. And I was fucking scared I’d lose you and I probably would’ve if it weren’t for how genuine your soul is. I don’t even question how I got so lucky to have you because I know that no answer will be good enough. There’s simply no logical explanation as to how or why you ever liked me back. You’re way too good for me - and please, Even, for the sake of this letter, would you just not fight me on this, just this once, because I know you want to._

_God, I love you. One minute, I’m fine, doing my homework or watching a movie. And then I’ll have the most minor thought about you and suddenly, I’m on the bridge of an anxiety attack because my brain doesn’t know how to process just how much you mean to me. I don’t even know if that makes sense, but you make me feel so much, Even. So much that I can’t function properly, at times._

_I just hope Oregon loves you even half as much as I do. I hope the people there treat you the way you should be treated. I hope you get to experience things there that are so amazing that you can’t even put into words how you feel._

_That’s how I feel about you, actually. You make me feel so good that I can’t accurately or intensely describe how incredible it feels to love you. You’ve changed my entire fucking life, Even Bech Næsheim. And there’s nothing that I can say that would explain just how thankful I am for what you do for me. You’re my safe haven. You’re my home._

_And even though I wish I could hold onto you and keep you in Norway for the rest of eternity, I know that the people you’ll meet in America will want to keep you, too. Because you’re just that fucking incredible. I’m convinced everybody needs you, Ev. In some way. You make everything better._

_I only spent a little over seven months with you at Nissen with me, which is hardly any time at all, but I’m now questioning how I’ll get through this school year without you by my side. What am I going to do when I’m so fucking tired at school and just need you to hold me? Or who’s going to bring me coffee in the morning of test days? Or when I’m excited about a grade, who am I going to celebrate with? And even though when we’re being super touchy in public and all our friends annoyingly tease us about being so sickly in love, I can’t help but think how much I’ll miss getting those comments._

_Even, I hope you know how happy and excited am I for you. This is such a great opportunity and I know you’ll have the time of your life. I’m excited to hear your stories. I’m excited to watch you grow. I’m excited to hear what you learn and what you do. I’m excited to know of the people you meet, whether it be your roommate or a cashier in a store. I’m just really excited for you. And I’m so fucking proud of you._

_I’m putting my bracelet in the envelope with the letter. (Along with some super cheesy vouchers Eva insisted you needed. You already know I’m rolling my eyes. Also, sorry you can’t use most of them until you’re back in Oslo or until I come visit.) I hope you wear it and think of how courageous you are and how special you are. (But_ maybe _I also like the idea of you having something sentimental of mine everywhere you go.)_

_You’re going to do amazing things in America, kjæreste._

_I love you. Like a fuckton. In this universe and all the others._

_Isak♡_

 

When Even was finished reading, he felt numb. He didn’t know what to do with his body and he was afraid to move or speak or even think. His eyes threatened to spill tears because he’d _never_ received such pure words from someone. And his thankful they were  from Isak.

 

“You okay?” Noah asked, slight concern in his voice.

 

Even, still not trusting his voice, nodded slowly as he _carefully_ folded the paper again, sliding it _carefully_ into the envelope. He didn’t want _anything_ to happen to this piece of paper.

 

“Are you sure?”

 

Even nodded again, feeling a little more composed as he took a deep breath. He picked up Isak’s _Courage_ bracelet. The one Sana gave Isak the previous year. It was a little bit worn, but still in great condition. Even touched every part of the leather band, not knowing how he didn’t notice Isak without it on his wrist. He supposed he was a little distracted with everything going on. He gently put it on his wrist, snapped the button into place. He immediately felt closer to Isak. Even sighed, leaning back in his seat, “That fucked me up.”

 

Noah laughed, glancing between Even and the road, “I can see that. You’re good, though?”

 

Even shrugged, chuckling at how endeared he felt by the thought of Isak. “I’m good. Sorry, for that. We met like fourteen hours ago and I’m fucking crying in your car on our way to the university.”

 

Noah shook his head, “No, it’s okay.”

 

Even still felt like he needed to explain himself, “Isak doesn’t talk about his feelings a lot, so it caught me guard.”

 

Noah smiled, waving him off, “I mean it, Even. It’s okay.”

 

He nodded to Noah, taking another deep breath as he just thought about his boyfriend, probably having dinner or watching a movie with the boys. He longed to be with him.

 

Sighing, again, he turned his attention to the coupon stack in his lap, picking up the vouchers that were bundled together by a paperclip.

 

Even smiled softly, seeing some in Isak’s writing and some that were so clearly written by Eva. Eva’s were all decorated in hearts, while Isak’s had a smiley face on some or poorly drawn stick figures on others. He can only imagine Isak groaning while he and Eva wrote them. He could almost hear Eva saying, _“Shut up, Isak. Even will love these. It’s fucking thoughtful.”_

 

Some were really sweet while others were pretty dirty. All of them read the same acceptance details, _Good for infinite time, accepted only in participating universes._

 

“Fuck,” Even laughed, as he looked through the vouchers, noting who wrote which ones.

 

**_Game night with the boys (Isak)_ **

 

**_Late night massage (Isak)_ **

 

**_Baz Luhrmann movie binge (Eva)_ **

 

**_A “knock-you-off-your-feet” kiss (Eva)_ **

 

**_Skinny dipping (Eva)_ **

 

**_Just you and me time (Isak)_ **

 

**_New sex position (Eva)_ **

 

**_One veto on anything (Isak)_ **

 

**_Night at a hotel (Eva)_ **

 

**_“Pretend it’s our first date” date (Isak)_ **

 

**_A sexy massage (Eva)_ **

 

**_Bubble bath (Eva)_ **

 

**_Semi public blowjob (Isak)_ **

 

Even smirked, thinking of Isak’s probable blush as he wrote that down.

 

**_Night on the town (Isak)_ **

 

**_Weekend getaway (Eva)_ **

 

**_Get out of jail, card (Isak)_ **

 

**_Make your own voucher: ____________ (Isak’s handwriting, with Eva’s hearts. A team effort.)_ **

 

He smiled, clipping them together again as he grabbed his phone to text his lover.

 

_My Baby❤️_

_………_

_Fy faen. I don’t even_

_know what to say._

 

_You can start with saying_

_you love me?_

 

_I love you._

_Like a fuckton._

_In this universe and all the others._

 

_❤️❤️❤️_

 

_HOW did you even write that?_

_Fuck, I don’t know what to do._

_And your bracelet. Isak,_

_are you okay not having it? Are_

_you sure you want me_

_to keep it for a while?_

 

_Absolutely. Take care of it for me xx_

 

_I love you._

 

_I love you, too._

_I mean, if you couldn’t tell from_

_that letter lol_

 

_I mean…_

_I don’t know if it how_

_obvious it actually was, but_

_you can ALWAYS tell me again._

 

_Hahaha, I love you, Even❤️_

 

_❤️❤️❤️_

 

_………_

 

“One more hour until we get to campus,” Noah said and Even smiled.

 

“Good, I feel like I’m going to explode.”

 

“Is that what love does to you?”

 

Even laughed, “Yes. I can’t wait for you and Logan to get past this awkward not-sure-what’s-happening stage. It’s everything.”

  



	6. friday - august

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Third week of August.  
> Campus of university.  
> Even meets two of his three roommates: Preston and Elijah.  
> Even meets Lucy.  
> Even struggles with a choice he made regarding the title he gives Isak in conversation.  
> Short glimpse of Even at a football game, where he meets Logan.  
> A party.  
> A (semi-short) steamy phone call with Isak.  
> A little advice exchange with Logan.  
> Short journal entry at the end.
> 
> TW: derogatory and homophobic language

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is so late, but I hope the lengthiness will makeup for my absence. Lol, I love you much and I love all the support and patience you give me. All my love to you and best wishes for whatever you need good vibes for ❤️❤️
> 
> Next chapter will be a flashback, so stay tuned(:
> 
> Much love and Happy Reading, always!!

“Okay,” Noah said, smiling as they drove by a series of buildings. The signs and people walking around were enough to tell Even they were _there_. They had arrived. “So, there’s the main hall where a lot of people go to hang out or do homework. The building we’ll be living in is on the other side.”

 

“We’re in the same building?

 

“Yep. I don’t know who your roommates are, though.”

 

Even nodded, looking curiously out the window, “How come we aren’t roommates?”

 

“I applied too late for housing.”

 

“Oh?”

 

Noah nodded and when Even turned back to him, he saw him blushing, “Logan and I were thinking about being roommates, but I was nervous so I kept pushing off the decision.”

 

“Then it was too late and you had to do something,” Even supplied, making an assumption.

 

“Yeah. It’s better this way, though.”

 

Even nodded, “That makes sense. You’ll have to tell me how it goes with him tonight.”

 

“Oh, for sure. Do you…” Noah started, turning into what Even guessed was tenant parking. “Do you want to have dinner with us?”

 

Even smiled and offered a small laugh, “That’s really nice, Noah, but no. I want to get settled in and maybe unpack as much as I can tonight. Plus, you should really spend time with Logan by yourself. You don’t need me.”

 

“Maybe you can meet up with us for the game, though.”

 

“The game?”

 

Noah nodded, parking and taking the key out of the ignition, “Football?”

 

“Oh,” Even didn’t even think about that. He forgot about American football. He didn’t really care to go, but he knew he probably should. He didn’t go to America to sit in his room all semester. “Maybe. I’ll see how things are going later.”

 

“Yeah, I can text you when we’re done with dinner, then?”

 

Even nodded with a grin before they got out, to find their housing.

 

___

 

Even was nervous. He didn’t know why, but he was. He had just walked into his temporary home and he was feeling a lot of things inside.

 

Walking further into the apartment, Even was greeted by two guys in the kitchen.

 

“Are you the Norwegian?” the taller of the two asked with half a joke in his tone. He wasn’t _that_ tall. Even noted that he was just slightly shorter than Isak. He took a moment to really look over his supposed roommates. The one who had spoken had fair skin and curly brown hair along with a pair of brown eyes to match. The other was a few inches shorter than the first. He had a chocolate complexion, cropped hair and honey golden eyes.

 

Even smiled, nodding, “That would be me, yes.”

 

“Cool. I’m Preston,” the taller boy said, holding his hand out for Even to shake.

 

“Even,” Even offered with a nod, accepting the handshake, turning to the other boy to exchange introductions with him, as well.

 

“I’m Elijah.”

 

“It’s nice meeting you guys.”

 

Elijah nodded, “Yeah, you too.”

 

“We have one other roommate, but he’s a fucking nerd,” Preston explained, his voice a bit condescending.

 

“Oh?” Even asked, not sure how to react to the statement.

 

Preston sighed, “Yeah, his name’s Nathan.”

 

“Where is he?”

 

“The library.” Elijah smiled, not seeming to have had the same distaste for Nathan that Preston so obviously did.

 

“Even though classes haven’t started?” Even questioned, half amused and half endeared. His mind floated to Isak again. Even thought about how Isak would probably do the same thing as Nathan once in uni. He could imagine Isak’s reddened cheeks from being teased about it.

 

“Like I said, he’s a fucking nerd,” Preston said, tipping his head as if further proving his point. And then a phrase fell from his mouth that made Even’s stomach pinch, “Probably a fucking fag, too.”

 

“You’re just jealous that he’ll graduate faster than us,” Elijah jokingly shoved Preston.

 

Preston rolled his eyes, something that made Even think of his boyfriend. He didn’t realize how much he thought about Isak until he couldn’t see him and be with him.

 

He thought about excusing himself to go call Isak, but he stopped himself. He needed to let things happen. He needed to be _there_. He could call Isak in the morning.

 

He couldn’t really focus on anything though, because Preston’s words echoed in his head.

 

_Fucking fag._

 

He kept telling himself he should say something. Call him out. But he felt frozen in place.

 

Preston’s voice broke Even from his thoughts as he said, “Well, Lucy is gonna be here any minute, so we should get ready to go.”

 

“I just need shoes,” Elijah said, then seemingly absorbed in his phone. Suddenly, he looked up, eyes meeting Even’s. “Do you want to go with us? We’re going to grab something to eat.”

 

Even shrugged, feeling a little quieter, “Sure. Are you going to the football game?”

 

Preston snorted, “Probably not. We usually skip them.”

 

Even nodded, “Cool. And Lucy? Who is that?”

 

“My girlfriend,” Preston grinned.

 

Elijah shoved him, with a smile, “She’s also my twin sister.”

 

“Well, I’m excited to meet her.”

 

As if on cue, the door to the apartment swung open and a pretty girl, that halfway resembled Elijah, stumbled in with a smile. Preston went to meet her, cupping her face in his hands and pressing a long firm kiss to her mouth. Even couldn’t help but watch them. It was sweet but he still felt a little breathy from Preston’s casual comment.

 

When they pulled apart, the two made their way back to the kitchen where Lucy and Elijah hugged tightly.

 

“Hi,” Lucy cheerily said, looking at Even over Elijah’s shoulder before breaking their hug. “I’m Lucy. What’s your name?”

 

“I’m Even,” Even smiles with a nod.

 

“Are you one of the roommates?”

 

Even quickly and very easily decided he liked Lucy. She was happy and really glowed. She seemed to be a different breed. The kind of person you find and want to hold onto forever, simply because their hearts are genuine and their tone is joyful. He felt only a little about wondering how a guy like Preston ended up with a gem like Lucy.

 

“He’s the foreign kid that I was telling you about,” Preston hummed, pressing a kiss against Lucy’s temple with an arm slung around her waist.

 

“Oh!” Lucy perked up, eyes shining, “Norway, right?”

 

Even nodded, “That’s right.”

 

“I’ve always wanted to go.”

 

“It’s beautiful,” Even affirmed. “Although, it’s beautiful here, too.”

 

“Your accent is adorable, Even.”

 

Even chuckled, “Thanks, I think.”

 

“You’re welcome,” Lucy smiled before turning to Preston. “Are we leaving then? I’m starving.”

 

Preston nodded, leaning down to give Lucy a peck on the mouth.

 

Even left his things untouched in the middle of the apartment as these three new whisked him away for dinner.

 

___

 

Even found himself sat around a restaurant table with Preston, Elijah and Lucy. They all chattered about all kinds of topics, but Elijah eventually broke off to chat one-on-one with Even.

 

“So, what’s your story, Even?”

 

Even smiled, “My story?”

 

Elijah nodded with half a shrug, “Yeah, like… what made you decide to come here?”

 

“I don’t know, to be honest. I just applied to a bunch of random schools. And when I was accepted here, I talked to my…” Even paused for only a second to side glance Preston, noticing that he and Lucy were listening. It intimidated Even. And it ultimately forced Even to make a choice. He immediately regretted the choice he made when he said it, too. He continued, decision made, “friend, Isak, he encouraged me to go for it.”

 

A pile of rocks settled in Even’s stomach. He felt sick. What was he doing?

 

He swallowed thickly, nodding through the rest of his explanation, “So, yeah. I mean, I had my family’s support, my friends. And Isak’s. He’s my best friend.” The statement was true, but Even felt like he’d just put a bandaid on a gun wound. “I was fluent in English already at that point, so… here I am.”

 

Elijah nodded, “That’s fucking cool, man. I wish I applied to foreign countries. I wish I applied out-of-State! But, I’m stuck here. Good ole Oregon.”

 

“It’s not so bad, right?” Even encouraged. “I mean, I’ve only been here for one day and I’m already loving it.”

 

“I guess.”

 

The conversation shifted again, and Even learned that Preston was from the east coast and it was his second year at the university. Elijah and Lucy were born and raised in Oregon, their parents lived only a few towns over. They were onto their second years, as well.

 

Even liked listening.

 

He learned that Lucy was studying psychology in children and adolescents. He could see her being successful in that. She was a shining star with a lot of compassion for others.

 

Elijah was studying to go into journalism with an emphasis in economics and business. Even had a lot of questions about that one. He was fascinated by what Elijah was doing, but he would be the first to admit that he didn’t understand much his explanations.

 

Lastly, Preston was surprisingly studying film and cinematic arts. The same thing as Even. Even smiled tightly, thinking about how fucking screwed he was.

 

He couldn’t avoid Preston and his less than accepting comments about the lgbtq+ community. Even had noticed a few times throughout the hours since meeting that Preston was not very careful with his words.

 

It made him uneasy and stressed out, but he didn’t know what to do.

 

“How long have you two been together?” Even asked Lucy and Preston, less interested in the answer than he seemed.

 

“It’ll be a year next month,” Preston hummed, looking at Lucy who was sitting very close to him.

 

Even smiled with a nod.

 

“Do you have a girlfriend back home?” Lucy asked Even.

 

Even felt his thoughts screech to a stop as he blinked at her, shaking his head, “No. I don’t have a girlfriend.”

 

Her face grew excited, eyes lighting up, “Oh, my God! We can find you a girlfriend while you’re here.”

 

Even nervously laughed, “You don’t have to do that.”

 

Lucy excitedly turned to Preston, “What about Sam? She needs to get out more.”

 

Preston shook his head, “Sam needs some fucking antidepressants, not a boyfriend.”

 

Lucy rolled her eyes, seeming to be annoyed at the comment, “Don’t he so insensitive, okay?”

 

Even sighed. They were only halfway through dinner and things were already seeming a little chaotic and unappealing.

 

___

 

Even showed up late to the football game, finding Noah at the bottom of the stands where he was waiting for him.

 

“Even,” Noah smiled, “How’s it been? How’re your roommates?”

 

Even shrugged, “Fine, I guess? I have yet to meet the last one. What about you?”

 

Noah nodded, “Good, yeah. One of my roommates skipped out early and decided not to come to school this semester, so I have my own room.”

 

“That sounds nice. Nobody in your space.”

 

“For real. Anyway, Logan is waiting up there for us.”

 

Even smiled, nodding. He felt comfortable with Noah and after feeling a little tense at dinner, he was happy to be back with someone that eased him. He couldn’t imagine Logan being someone who carried negative energy. So, he looked forward to meeting him as well.

 

They climbed the steps in the stands, making it to the row Landon was on. Luckily, they were on the end. Noah sat beside Logan, Even guessed. He recognized him from the pictures Noah showed him.

 

“Logan,” Noah started as Even sat down. “This is Even.”

 

“Hey,” Logan reaching his hand out to shake Even’s. “It’s nice meeting you.”

 

“You, too.”

 

“Noah seemed pretty excited about you, you know?”

 

Even smiled, looking over at Noah who was deeply blushing. He chuckled and elbowed Noah lightly in the ribs, “Yeah? He seemed pretty excited about you, too.”

 

Noah groaned, putting his hands over his flushed cheeks. “Okay,” he said, “fuck both of you.”

 

Even and Logan laughed together at the blushing boy. Logan casually put a hand on Noah’s shoulder, leaning in closely to teasingly comfort him with quiet words. Even’s heart ached at the scene. It was really starting to hit him how much he missed his own blushing boyfriend.

 

Even directed his attention away from them, letting them have a moment to themselves as he sent a simple text to Isak.

 

_My Baby❤️_

_………_

 

_Hei, baby._

_I hope you’re sleeping_

_right now, even though I_

_want to talk to you._

_I love you. And I’m really_

_starting to miss you. I missed you_

_before I even left, but now?_

_Fuck, I wish you were with me._

 

_Maybe call me when you wake up?_

 

_………_

 

It was 5:00 in Oslo, so Even wasn’t expecting anything for at least another four hours, assuming Isak was sleeping. He hoped he was.

 

Even looked back up at the game, not really following what was happening. He didn’t know all the rules to American Football and he came in too far into the game to really figure it out. That, and his head was filled with too many thoughts and feelings.

 

“There’s a party after this,” Logan said, leaning around Noah to look at Even. “You wanna tag along?”

 

Even nodded with a half smile, “That’d be cool.”

 

“Great. It’s right by my building so you can crash there,” Logan offered with a kind smile.

 

Even looked at Noah as if asking for direction of how to answer. Noah just nodded lightly, which caused Even to meet Logan’s eyes again, nodding to him.

 

Noah turned more to Even, “Have you talked to Isak today?”

 

Even shook his head, “Not really. A few texts, but I’ve been out and he was with friends.”

 

“That makes sense,” Noah said. “You two should have like a video chat date or something tomorrow. Logan and I did that a bunch of times over the summer. Long distance isn’t exactly easy, you know?”

 

“Yeah. We’ve done it before. We’ve actually done long distance more than we haven’t. It sucks, though. And it’s different this time with the time zones and shit.”

 

“Fuck, I forgot about that. What time is it there?”

 

Even bit his lip a little, “Early. Just after 5:00.”

 

“In the morning?”

 

“Yeah,” Even sighed, slouching a little as if to help him stay warm. He wished he’d worn his signature layers. The evening was chilly and all he had on was a T-shirt and a simple cotton jacket. “But I’ll talk to him later. I’m not too worried. I might skip out of the party a little early if he calls.”

 

Noah nodded, “I get it. I’ll send you Logan’s address, if you do decide to leave early. He has a spare key on top of the door frame.”

 

Logan nudged Noah with a grin, “Are you telling him how to break into my place?”

 

Noah and Even both laughed as Noah answered, a blush painted on his face, “Yes.”

 

Even liked them. Their relationship reminded him of his relationship with Isak. He could see the admiration they so clearly had for each other. And the simple touches, made to look casual, always caught his eye and made his heart pinch.

 

He felt an icky feeling in the depths of his stomach as he remembered his vague denial of his relationship. He didn’t feel very good knowing he was hiding Isak from his roommates. He felt wrong doing so. He felt his lungs burn and he didn’t know how to fix the mess he’d already started making.

 

___

 

The party air was suffocatingly dense of alcohol and sweat. Only occasionally Even missed drinking and smoking at parties, but not usually. He felt that way a lot until Isak offered that he’d quit with him. After that, he only felt that way when he went to a party without Isak.

 

But that party, his first American college party, Even missed being a participant. And he missed Isak. But the latter wasn’t a surprise.

 

He slipped out the backdoor, thankful for the cool breeze in contrast to the stuffy air inside.

 

It was 1:30 and Even was feeling tired. He wanted to go back to his new place and unpack a little more. He hadn’t had much of a chance to do anything except for putting his bags in his room.

 

But, he knew he needed Noah to get back anyway. He didn’t know how to find his way there. So, he was stuck for a while at the party, or he could go back to Logan’s, considering his apartment building was across the street.

 

He hardly blinked when his phone started buzzing with a call, the first reaction from him was a smile when he saw the name and picture on screen.

 

“Halla?” Even greeted, his voice turning all melty.

 

“Halla,” Isak mumbled, seeming sleepy.

 

“It really isn’t fair that I have to keep listening to your hot morning voice like this. Especially when I can’t do anything about it.”

 

Isak hummed into the phone before the sound turned into a yawn, “Well, then stop having me call when I wake up in the morning.”

 

“I’ve only been here for two days, Is.”

 

“Mhm, so? You can always call _me_ when _you_ wake up.”

 

“Okay, okay. You’ve got me,” Even smiled. “How are you?”

 

“Good.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Yes. Naked. In your bed.”

 

Even groaned, feeling his skin grow hot, “Stop that, right now.”

 

Isak laughed, “Never. It’s true, though.”

 

“Faen, Isak.”

 

“Say that again,” Isak breathed.

 

Even gripped the phone tighter as he glanced around to the people around him. Most of them were smoking, already high or on their way. Even was grateful for the language barrier. “I’m at a party,” he tried to reason.

 

“Nobody will even understand you. Help me get off.”

 

“Fy faen, Issy. Do you know what you do to me?”

 

Isak sighed, “I miss you.”

 

“I miss you, baby.”

 

“Are you alone? In a bathroom or something?”

 

“Nei,” Even said as his eye caught view of the building across the street that was suddenly begging for his presence. “But I can be. Hold on.”

 

He pulled his phone from his ear and sent a quick text to Noah, telling him he was heading to Logan’s. Noah’s response was fast.

 

_Noah_

_………_

 

_Feeling a little tired. Still_

_adjusting to the time_

_change. I’m going to head_

_to Logan’s and hang out_

_there and call Isak._

 

_Okayyy!! Be safe._

_Let me know if you_

_need anything. We’ll_

_probably be out for a while_

_longer. Logan says you_

_can crash on his roommate’s_

_bed - his roommate is staying at_

_his girlfriends. :)_

 

_………_

 

“Okay, baby,” Even said into the phone, feet in motion toward the side gate. “I’m leaving the party.”

 

“Nei, nei, nei,” Isak started. “You don’t have to leave because of me.”

 

“Yes, I do. And I’m going to.”

 

“Ev—“

 

“Don’t argue. I’m not even doing anything here. I’m pretty much the only sober one here and my boyfriend is naked, in my bed. How the fuck do you expect me to stay?” Even explained, cutting Isak off.

 

“Okay, fuck. Do you want to switch to video chat?”

 

“Not right now,” Even sighed. “I just want to focus on your voice.”

 

“You’re a sap,” Isak panted. And Even imagined his skin flushed pink. Everywhere.

 

“Are you touching yourself?” Even asked, halfway across the street.

 

“Mhm,” Isak hummed. “I wish you were touching me.”

 

“Me, too. Go slow, okay?”

 

Even let his long legs quickly carry him to the apartment, his discomfort from restrictive pants being a motivator to move faster than normal. He focused on the way to Logan’s as Isak’s pants filled the speaker. The subtle wet sounds in the background didn’t help Even’s mind stay on track, though. He shook his head, sighing deeply when he reached the steps of the complex.

 

Taking two at a time, Even repeated Logan’s apartment information as a way to avoid getting distracted by Isak’s sounds.

 

_Building A, floor 2, number 18._

 

It seemed like ages until he got there, but when he did, he could finally take a drop breath as he easily swiped the key from the top of the door frame and shoved it in the lock.

 

“Still with me, baby?” he breathed into the phone and he was rewarded with a cry from Isak.

 

“Ev, please.”

 

“Issy, take a breath,” Even urged, pushing open the door. He felt a little strange having a moment like this with his boyfriend in someone else’s bed, so Even headed for the bathroom. It was private and safe.

 

He shut and locked the door, even though nobody else was there, and shoved his pants down his legs. He wrapped his long fingers around his strained penis as Isak whispered dirty things to him.

 

Things he wasn’t used to hearing Isak say, but he felt more and more turned on from it, causing him to stroke himself a little more aggressively than he normally would.

 

“Fuck, Isak. I love you.”

 

“I wish you were inside me, Even. I wish I could feel you, right now,” Isak said, heaving each and every breath. Each word, each syllable, each sound. It all seemed to be pulled from Isak with a lot of effort and work.

 

Even understood why. Isak was never much of a talker during sex. He was loud, sure, but he wasn’t too vocal.

 

“I love you. I love you, so much. Fuck,” Isak groaned. “I’m going to come.”

 

“Issy,” Even huffed. He wasn’t in much of a better place.

 

“Ev,” Isak sounded faint and his voice was a little higher than usual. “You’re so hot. I wish… I wish…”

 

Even listened, clinging to every breath Isak took or sound he made, flicking his wrist and gripping his phone almost too tightly.

 

Isak cried out and Even knew he’d come. And it made him fall over the edge, too. He aimed into the open toilet, not wanting to make a mess. He called out his out relief, letting Isak hear how pleased and satisfied he was from their short phone-sex exchange.

 

They both breathed unevenly for a full minute until composing themselves.

 

“You wish what?” Even encouraged, breathing almost regulated. “You didn’t finish your sentence.”

 

Isak sighed, and the line was quiet for a few seconds.

 

“Isak?” Even asked, a little worried as he pulled up his pants, securing the button back into place.

 

Suddenly, the sound that was so distinctly recognizable as the FaceTime ringtone rang through the air.

 

Even pulled his phone from his ear, looking down at it.

 

_My Baby❤️ would like to FaceTime…_

 

Even smiled, answering it, which converted their regular call to a video chat.

 

And there Isak’s face was. His cheeks were lushed pink. His eyes looked somewhere between fuck-happy and tired. And his mouth was pulled into a small, almost sad smile.

 

Isak spoke quietly, “I wish you were holding me.”

 

Even sighed, leaving the bathroom and going out to the living room to rest on the couch as he talked to his boyfriend. “I wish that, too.”

 

Isak closed his eyes, taking a few deep breaths as he pressed his lips together.

 

Even touched his finger to the screen, ghosting over Isak’s beautiful features.

 

But when Isak opened his eyes again, Even’s heart cracked. His eyes didn’t look fuck-happy or tired, anymore. They just looked sad.

 

“Don’t be sad, love,” Even whispered like they were the only two people in the universe. And to him, in that moment, they were.

 

“I’m jealous,” Isak mumbled, biting his lip.

 

Even’s brows dipped, very confused, “Jealous of what, Is?”

 

“Of all the other Isaks in all the other universes. The ones that have their Even with them,” Isak explained, half of his mouth lifting into a bittersweet smirk.

 

“I’m not,” Even said, trying to comfort his sad boy.

 

“How come?”

 

“Because there will never be a better universe than this one. In some other universe, Isak and Even are laying together. They probably just had some really fucking good sex or maybe they haven’t even reached that point in their relationship, but you know what they don’t have?”

 

Isak stayed quiet, eyes moving around the screen as he waited for an answer.

 

“They don’t have quite what we have. Our relationship is strong enough to deal with long distance. When we’re apart, we love each other with everything we have. And that makes our times together better than what any other universe could offer their Isaks and Evens. This universe, _our_ universe, is the _only_ universe that I want to know.”

 

One year left Isak’s eye. It didn’t seem like a sad or upset tear, it seemed like on of gratitude and love.

 

“I love you, a lot,” Isak whispered.

 

“I love you, too,” Even mumbled back, a smile on his lips. “I love you, now and… and for forever.”

 

“Pinkie promise?” Isak said, a blush creeping to his cheeks as that sheepish look appeared on his face.

 

“Always, baby,” Even promised, holding up his pinkie as Isak did they same.

 

They laughed together as they pretended to link pinkies from half a world away, through the screens of their phones.

 

“You should sleep,” Isak decided, sighing.

 

Even nodded as he caught view of the time, “I should.”

 

“Call your mom, okay? When you wake up. She wants to hear from you.”

 

Even nodded, again, “I will. Tell her I love her. And Pappa. And Elle.”

 

Isak smiled, “Of course.”

 

“And Issy?” Even breathed, feeling the events of the day begin to settle into his bones.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“I love you.”

 

Isak licked his lips the way he did when he was trying to stop himself from smiling. “I love you, too. Goodnight, Ev. Sleep well.”

 

“Have a good day, baby. I’ll talk to you later.”

 

“Bye,” Isak whispered so quietly, he almost didn’t hear it.

 

“Bye,” Even said back, pressing the red _End Call_ button.

 

Isak’s face disappeared and the apartment was silent again.

 

It didn’t last long, though as the door to the apartment was pushed open. Even sat up on the couch to see what was going on. Logan and Noah came stumbling through the door. Noah was a giggling mess, clearing intoxicated, and Logan was trying to shush him.

 

“Even,” Noah cried, a little excited, but mostly just sloppy. He broke from Logan’s hold, almost tripping to get to Even. Even smiled as Noah sat beside him. “I had so much fun tonight. Did you have fun?”

 

Even nodded, “I did, yeah. But, I think you should probably drink some water and go to sleep.”

 

Noah shrugged, looking over at Logan before his glossy eyes returned to Even, “That’s what Logan said, too.”

 

“He’s right.”

 

“He’s always right. He’s really smart. Did you know that? He takes really good care of me, and he isn’t even my boyfriend.”

 

Even glanced back at Logan with raised brows. Logan looked a little sheepish, kicking his foot against the carpet and avoiding Even’s gaze.

 

Noah sighed, slouching into Even more, “I wish he was, though.”

 

Logan looked up, eyes widened. Even couldn’t help but smile as he looked back at Noah, “Maybe you can ask him about that tomorrow. Yeah?”

 

Noah nodded, yawning, and that seemed to snap Logan out of his funk as he hurried to Noah’s side, “Let’s get you some water, okay?”

 

With a dopey smile, Noah easily went with Logan, his arms around his shoulders. Even watched as Logan took Noah to the bedroom and waited while he tended to his needs.

 

It was only a few minutes before Logan found his way back out to Even, scratching the back of his neck.

 

“Is he sleeping?”

 

Logan nodded, “Yeah, he is.”

 

“So… boyfriends?” Even urged with a teasing tone and smile.

 

“Fuck, I don’t know,” Logan exhaled, collapsing onto the opposite couch than Even. “I didn’t know if that was what he wanted.”

 

“I think it is. And not because of the drunk confession. He really fucking likes you.”

 

“You think?”

 

Even shook his head, “I know.”

 

“He just seemed so hesitant. I mean, I wanted us to room together this year… or this semester, at least. But he, he couldn’t do it.”

 

“He doesn’t doubt his feelings for you,” Even tried. “He was just nervous about living together since everything is so new. I’m not really sure I should even be saying any of this, it’s his to share. I just- Logan, let him feel what he feels. His hesitance of _moving in_ with you has everything to do with what he feels for you, not what he doesn’t.”

 

Logan nodded, letting it all soak in. “Noah told me about Isak.”

 

Even nodded, unsure of where he was going with it.

 

When Even figures out that Logan wasn’t going anywhere with it, Even decided to be a little vulnerable. Logan was being open, so Even could be, too.

 

“I’ve been here for one day and I already feel like I’m fucking it up.”

 

Logan’s brows bunched up, “What do you mean?”

 

“One of my roommate’s makes some really homophobic comments. And I’m usually so unafraid of shutting those down, but I _couldn’t._ Something stopped me from doing it. And now, I feel like I’m betraying Isak because I referred to him as my _friend_. I don’t know what to do about it, either.”

 

“You’re not that deep in the mess, though,” Logan said, trying to be supportive.

 

Even shrugged, “I feel like I am.”

 

“Just find a spot in conversation to bring it up.”

 

“Yeah, I should.”

 

Logan smiled, “You'll be fine.”

 

Even sighed, looking over at Logan, “If you ever need to talk about anything or if you need help with anything - relating to Noah or something else - I, uh, sometimes give good advice.”

 

Logan laughed, “I appreciate that. I’m pretty shitty at advice, but I extend the same to you, especially if you just need someone to listen. I _am_ good at that.”

 

Even smiled, feeling a little more at ease. He felt good about Logan. And he could see why Noah liked him. He was easy to talk to and he was calming to be around.

 

Even just hoped he could pull his shit together and fix this mess before it got too big.

  


_...I’m feeling so many different things lately. Mostly, I feel lost. It hasn’t been even 48 hours in America and I’m keeping Isak a secret from my roommates. He’d be so disappointed if he knew. I should talk to him. I should talk to my roommates. Elijah seems to be the most approachable. I don’t know, though. I worry how they - Preston, especially - would treat me if they knew. But I feel like I’d be betraying Isak if I don’t tell them..._


	7. two years + some months ago

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> FLASHBACK:  
> Even and Isak explore something new.

_ “Isak?” Even said quietly to his friend. The room was dark and he wasn’t sure if it made him feel better or worse.  _

 

_ “Yeah?” Isak whispered back, his voice just as soft.  _

 

_ Part of Even had hoped Isak had fallen asleep, but he couldn’t leave it alone, now. “You’re my best friend, you know?” _

 

_ “More than your other friends?” Isak asked, a tease in his tone. It seemed so out of place for Even to hear, considering all the feelings he had floating around inside him.  _

 

_ Even rolled onto his side to be able to look at Isak, “Yeah. More than them. You’re my best friend.” _

 

_ Isak breathed a soft laugh through his nose, turning to face Even, too. Isak’s room was almost too dark to see each other, but Even used his imagination.  _

 

_ “You’re mine, too.” _

 

_ Even nodded, biting his lip. “Isak?” _

 

_ Isak laughed and Even could understand why. He clearly already had Isak’s attention, yet he was asking for it again. “Yes, Even?”  _

 

_ Even sighed, drawing a pattern against his pillow with his fingertips. “Have you ever kept something from a friend that you really  _ really _ wanted to talk to them about, but you were afraid to?” _

 

_ Isak hummed, thinking, “I think so, but just little stuff. Why?” _

 

_ Even’s heart was racing in his chest. He really didn’t know how a fifteen year old boy could make him feel so jittery and antsy. “I want to talk to you about something. Mostly just tell you something, I guess.” _

 

_ “Okay?” _

 

_ “I don’t want it to get awkward between us, though.” _

 

_ Isak groaned, pushing lightly at Even’s shoulder, “Even, I’ve had a really shitty day. Nothing you have to tell me could make it worse.” _

 

_ And Even couldn’t help but notice how sad Isak sounded. So, instead of saying anything, because the fear inside of him crippled his voice, he leaned forward and pressed his mouth against Isak’s.  _

 

_ His eyes were pinched shut and he felt so silly for being so nervous. He was more than two years older than Isak; he felt like he should have more confidence.  _

 

_ Isak gasped, tensing up, but Even pressed on, and finally, after what felt like an eternity, Isak relaxed into Even. Even couldn’t really believe it when Isak didn’t only relax, but he was kissing back. It allowed Even to take a deep breath. It relieved him.  _

 

_ Their mouths moved in choppy short kisses, it was new and refreshing. But it was also a little awkward. Even didn’t know what he could do or where he could put his hands. His unsure thoughts caused him to pull away, a little suction pop echoing in his ears.  _

 

_ “I like you,” Even breathed out.  _

 

_ Even felt Isak sit up in bed before he got up, altogether. Dread sat deep in Even’s belly as he sat up, too, listening to Isak’s footsteps head to the door.  _

 

_ What did he do? Why’d he have to fuck up the one perfect thing?  _

 

_ But then, the room flooded with light and blue eyes found green from across the room. Isak stood at his door, fingers still on the light switch as he watched Even. He was dressed in sweats and a T-shirt.  _

 

_ The quiet remained between them for long seconds, until Isak finally did something. He let his hand drop and made his way back to the bed. He crawled in, beside Even, pulling the covers up and over his shoulders. It encouraged Even to lie back down. Then Isak took it upon himself to tuck himself under Even’s jaw. His head landed on Even’s chest and Even tried to keep his inhales and exhales as even as possible.  _

 

_ “You’re not fucking around?” Isak asked, his voice quiet.  _

 

_ Even dusted his fingers up and down Isak’s arm, feeling for goosebumps. “I’m not fucking around.” _

 

_ Isak looked up at Even from his spot on his chest, “You like me romantically?” _

 

_ Even nodded, “I do.” _

 

_ “Me, too.” _

 

_ Even raised his eyebrows at that, half in question, and Isak just nodded, looking up at Even’s full lips.  _

 

_ Isak lifted the side of his mouth into a half smile before leaning up and kissing Even once more. It made Even feel hot all over, but he felt really good.  _

 

_ And nothing much was said after that. They stayed in each other’s arms, and swapped short kisses every now and then. The words between them stayed in a quiet whisper and when they finally turned the light off again, slept took them easily.  _

 

_ ___ _

 

_ The following morning, Even woke up before Isak. It was a common occurrence for them, but what wasn’t so common was Isak being pressed along Even’s side. His leg was thrown over Even’s lap and his hand was hooked around the side of Even’s neck.  _

 

_ Even took slow breaths, letting the morning light seep into him as he closed his eyes and thought about the night before. He couldn’t believe he’d done that. He kissed Isak. Isak kissed him back. They both admitted to liking each other in a romantic way. And those three statements made Even’s mind turn to goo.  _

 

_ He smiled to himself, looking down at Isak. His face looked peaceful, at rest. And he couldn’t help but lean in and kiss his forehead. He sighed against his hair, thinking of everything.  _

 

_ His hands rubbed over Isak’s back and arms, one of them settling on the leg that was slung over Even.  _

 

_ He wasn’t sure how many minutes went by before Isak started stirring and shifting, but he helped him out of his sleep by running his fingers through Isak’s hair and kissing his cheeks. Isak took a sharp inhale, pinching his eyes together tightly before slowly blinking them open. Green eyes searched around the room before falling on Even.  _

 

_ “Halla,” Even whispered.  _

 

_ “Hei,” Isak smiled, and Even couldn’t remember another time where Isak seemed so content about waking up.  _

 

_ “How are you?”  _

 

_ Isak blinked, sucking his bottom lip into his mouth for a moment before releasing it and looking into Even’s eyes. “Better than I was yesterday.” _

 

_ Even smiled fondly, “I’m glad. I know you had a shitty day.” _

 

_ Isak shook his head, sniffling, “Not because of that. I just- I’m happy you told me.” _

 

_ “Told you that I liked you?” _

 

_ Isak nodded.  _

 

_ “Because you like me, too?” Even needed to hear Isak say it. He almost felt like last night didn’t really happen.  _

 

_ Isak nodded again.  _

 

_ “Say it,” Even begged, his voice quiet.  _

 

_ “Because I like you, too, Even.” _

 

_ Even exhaled with a smile, nodding. “So, now what?” _

 

_ Isak shrugged, and Even noticed how unsure he looked. He seemed small and the thought had a bit of reality crash down on Even.  _

 

_ Isak was fifteen. And only starting his first year at Nissen in the fall.  _

 

_ “I’m a little scared,” Isak confessed, not looking at Even’s face.  _

 

_ Even nodded, “Me too.” _

 

_ “You are?” _

 

_ “Yeah. I don’t want to fuck anything up.” _

 

_ Isak smiled small at that, clearly in agreement with the statement. “Maybe, we can just,” Isak said, pausing to gather himself, “see where it goes?” _

 

_ Even grinned, nodding and squeezing Isak closer to him, “I like that a lot.” _

 

_ Isak sighed in contentment, resting further into Even.  _

 

_ “Promise me something?” _

 

_ Isak nodded against Even’s neck.  _

 

_ “If this all goes to shit, promise me that we’ll still be friends.” _

 

_ Isak’s lips connected with Even’s collarbone before he whispered, “I promise.” _

 

_ ___ _

 

_ They’d hung out for the rest of the weekend, with no more actual kisses exchanged. It was all soft touches and cuddles, with the occasional cheek or forehead kiss.  _

 

_ It was Sunday afternoon and Even was on his way to the train with Isak. Nothing seemed different. They laughed and shoved each other as they walked, and Even was comforted by their normalcy. Though, when they reached the train, the tenseness fell over them again.  _

 

_ Isak avoided Even’s gaze. So, Even tried to be the confident one. He rested his hand on Isak’s shoulder, shaking him a little. “I had fun. I’ll see you next weekend, okay? You’re still planning on coming over, right?” _

 

_ Isak looked up through his lashes, nodding softly, “Yeah. On Friday, once I’m out of school.” _

 

_ “Okay,” Even said, pressing his lips together as he watched Isak. “Is?” _

 

_ “Yeah?” _

 

_ “Can I kiss you?” _

 

_ Isak’s eyes widened as he looked around before meeting Even’s eyes again, “Um…” _

 

_ Even smiled, not surprised by Isak’s obvious discomfort in the idea, “It’s okay. Next time.” _

 

_ They hugged tightly, and when they separated, Isak glanced around them before quickly pushing to his tippy toes to kiss the side of Even’s mouth. A small half kiss.  _

 

_ Even grinned, feeling warm inside. He felt about as warm as Isak’s pink cheeks looked.  _

 

_ “I’ll see you.” _

 

_ Isak nodded. _

 

_ And Even was off.  _

 

_ ___ _

 

_ The week went on. The boys chatted over snapchat and text, along with FaceTime and phone calls. It wasn’t unusual, either. They often spent their days apart talking to each other.  _

 

_ But something in the air felt a little different on that Friday. Even waited for Isak at the station and watched as he took quick steps while exiting the train. He watched as his feet hit the pavement. He watched as Isak’s eyes scanned the crowd until they found him.  _

 

_ He watched Isak’s face light up.  _

 

_ And he watched a fearless looking Isak approach him and walk right into his arms. A tight hug.  _

 

_ Isak’s nose pressed against Even’s neck as he whispered a quiet, “I missed you.” _

 

_ Even rubbed his back, squeezing him tightly, “I missed you.” _

 

_ Isak pulled away from the embrace, looking ready to be anywhere else than the train station.  _

 

_ Even understood. The ride was always long.  _

 

_ They left together. When they arrived at Even’s house, nobody was home. Elle was out playing at a friend’s house and Even’s parents were on a date.  _

 

_ It was just the two of them.  _

 

_ And Even was prepared to spend the evening in whatever way Isak had in mind.  _

 

_ They grabbed some snacks, neither with care enough to make dinner, and they headed off to Even’s room. Even sat down first, resting back against the wall. He was a little surprised, but quite pleased when Isak curled right into his side.  _

 

_ Even could feel Isak’s heavy eyes on him, so he turned to meet the green gaze with a smile.  _

 

_ Isak seemed to be deep in thought, though.  _

 

_ “Are you okay?” _

 

_ Isak blinked, nodding. Even wasn’t sure what to say. When he was about to speak, Isak blurted out, “Will you kiss me?” _

 

_ Even’s eyebrows shot up, “You want me to kiss you?” _

 

_ Isak nodded, a blush high on his cheeks, “Will you?” _

 

_ Even smiled, leaning in, but only resting his forehead against Isak’s. Their noses touched in a quiet agreement. “Relax.” _

 

_ Isak took a deep breath and Even could feel his body loosening up. He didn’t feel so stiff against Even’s side.  _

 

_ Even cupped Isak’s jaw before he sealed their mouths together in a gentle kiss. It set butterflies loose in his tummy and made him almost too smiley.  _

 

_ It was different than that first night. They’d been so slow and quiet with their movements, afraid they were going to break something. But this was different. Even could tell that Isak felt a little more confident this go around. His actions were a little more sure and he didn’t seem so hesitant.  _

 

_ Even played into that a bit, leaning further and further into Isak. They shifted and resituated until they were in a more comfortable position, despite it making Even’s heart race faster, faster, faster.  _

 

_ Isak was flat on his back, legs partially spread with Even over him, letting their legs slide together. But, Even slowed them down. He needed to be the responsible one.  _

 

_ He let their long kisses taper off into short pecks and then into nothing at all. Even took a deep breath, opening his eyes to find a pair of green seas staring back.  _

 

_ “Halla,” Even whispered, dusting his thumb over Isak’s cheek.  _

 

_ Isak looked at Even for a few moments, remaining quiet. He breathed evenly, and Even could tell by the look on his face that he was thinking deeply about something.  _

 

_ And then it came out. Quietly, but it was there.  _

 

_ “Did I do something wrong?” _

 

_ Even let his brows dip, showing his confusion, “What? Nei. Of course not.” _

 

_ “Then why did you stop?” _

 

_ Even gave a small smile, tracing over Isak’s eyebrow with his fingertip. “Because this is important to me.  _ You’re  _ important to me. And I really don’t want anything premature to happen between us. It’s best to keep things simple, for now.” _

 

_ “Because you think I’m a kid,” Isak said. And it wasn’t a question.  _

 

_ It made Even’s thoughts falter for a moment before he gathered himself again, “I don’t think you’re a kid, Isak. But, I can’t ignore the age thing.” _

 

_ Isak sighed, seeming a little annoyed. Not necessarily at Even, but he did seem annoyed at the situation. “I’ve always hated our fucking age gap.” _

 

_ Even smiled down at the pouting boy, “How come?” _

 

_ “You could always do things before me or better than me. Or sometimes I felt like my age stopped you from being able to do things. At least, it stopped you from being able to do things  _ with _ me sometimes. I feel like that with this. Like you know exactly what you’re doing but we can’t do anything because I’m a kid.” _

 

_ “In time, Isak. All the best things take time. Also, before you assume I know what I’m doing, let me assure you that I absolutely do not know what I’m doing.” _

 

_ Isak groaned, but the tint in his cheeks was a giveaway. Isak was fine. They were fine.  _

 

_ “Whatever.” Isak huffed, “Well, while we’re waiting for me to grow up, do you want to play FIFA? Or watch a movie or something?” _

 

_ Even grinned, nodding before planting one last kiss to Isak’s mouth.  _


	8. tuesday - august

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fourth week of August.   
> Even’s first class.   
> Phone call with Isak.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woof. It’s been a HOT MINUTE since I’ve been here. I apologize for my absence. It’s been a wild few months for me. I feel like I’m constantly saying that, and I don’t want to rely on that excuse, but sometimes life gets you down and then proceeds to kick you while you’re there.   
> I’ve been dealing with a lot of family issues (health things + feelings being hurt by each other) and things with work have been demanding and exhausting. I moved. And during all this, all I wanted to do was write, but I was suffering from so much emotional constipation with everything going on that I just... I couldn’t do it. All I could actually verbalize via written words was how I was feeling and what was going on in my life. Thankfully, I’ve been able to get out my feelings and actually write something. This chapter was an uphill battle. It sat in my docs with 300 words for the last six weeks and finally over the last two days I was able to bring it up to 1,800 words. I know that’s still shorter than my usual chapter but hey, an update is an update and I’m taking baby steps to get back into this. 
> 
> I’ve missed you all dearly. And I hope you’re still here and ready to finish this journey with Even, Isak and myself ❤️ 
> 
> All my love from me to you. 
> 
> Happy reading Xx

The weekend had cruised by and before Even realized, he was finding his first class on Tuesday morning. 

 

He felt a little guilty since he hadn’t talked much to anyone back home. He’d been so busy unpacking, sorting out his room and getting settled in with new roommates that he hardly had time to really call home. He chatted with his mom the day before for a few minutes before Preston was pulling him out the door to go meet some friends. 

 

He hadn’t talked to Isak since Friday other than a few texts or snapchats. It made him feel fucking awful. 

 

Despite that, Even was actually relatively excited to start classes. He had four courses this semester: film and cinema, renaissance art history, introduction to biology and trigonometry. 

 

On Tuesdays, he had the film and cinema course. Only one class. And it was the one he was assuming would be his favorite. 

 

He walked into the classroom, halting at the door as his eyes scanned over those already there until they landed on Logan. 

 

Logan smiled, waving him over to join him. 

 

He did, a smile on his face as he grew a little more excited about this class. He was happy to have a friend in class with him. 

 

“Hey, man,” Logan greeted as Even sat down. 

 

Even really liked Logan. Logan was easy to talk to and he felt safe doing so. 

 

“Hi,” Even smiled, getting comfortable in the seat as he dropped his backpack to rest between his feet.

 

“This class is going to be fucking rad. I had this professor for a different course last semester and it was my favorite. By far. Everyone I’ve talked with loved this one, too.”

 

Even nodded, ready to respond with his genuine excitement when he felt someone drop down beside him.

 

“What’s up, losers?”

 

Even didn’t have to look to know that Preston had just presented himself. Even sighed, slouching further into his seat as Logan greeted Preston in an entirely Logan-esque way, introducing himself since they obviously didn’t know each other well.

 

Even was fighting an internal battle, he was looking forward to this class, but with Preston sitting near him, Even felt his skin start to crawl. He liked Preston, really. He was a little wild and was a fun seeker, though being between Preston and Logan - seeing what skeptical faces Logan made at Even about this - was making Even really unsure of what was going to come up in the future in the class. 

 

When a group of girls came in and sat behind the three boys, Preston was quick to give them attention. Even felt quite awkward about it, considering he knew Preston was dating Lucy. 

 

“Sure,” Preston started, his body still turned around as he spoke with the girls. “Ladies, this is my buddy, Even. He’s Norwegian and he’s an artist,” Preston hummed enthusiastically at the end, tacking in a chef’s kiss which made the girls laugh. One, in particular, didn’t. She was just smiling shyly, peeking over at Even the way Isak does when he’s feeling flirty with Even. 

 

Even sighed. Fuck. He missed Isak. He wanted to talk to him and see him. And he wished he was here instead of this girl. He learned their names, finding out that the girl making eyes at him was named Taylor - a red headed girl from California. 

 

Logan patted Even’s leg encouragingly as the girls began asking his questions. 

 

Even still answered them. Being as charming as ever. 

 

But he knew this was going to be a long semester. 

 

___

 

“Hei, baby,” Even said into the phone, eyes pinched shut as he put his forehead in his hand. He was sitting on the paved steps outside the media department. The sun was warm and he tried to focus on that rather than the aching he really felt inside. The  _ guilt  _ he really felt for taking so long to call home. 

 

“How are you?” Isak asked, his tone was neutral and Even didn’t know how to take it. He couldn’t tell if he was at all annoyed or hurt by Even’s tardy call, and he couldn’t tell if Isak was just distracted - though, he hoped that was the reason for the neutrality. 

 

“I’m fine, I guess,” Even says, sticking the tip of his thumb in his mouth to bite his nail. 

 

He’d imagine that Isak was nodding silently, waiting for something from Even. 

 

“I’m sorry I didn’t call yesterday,” Even started. “I didn’t really have a free moment. I know that’s a really shitty excuse. I’m sorry.”

 

“It’s okay,” Isak said, sounding like he really meant that. “I get it. You’re trying to get settled and I understand.”

 

“Yeah… I miss you.” 

 

“I miss you, too.” Isak’s voice was somber and it pinched at Even’s heart. He hated hearing it. 

 

So, he quickly changed subjects, “How’s being a third year?”

 

Isak snorted and Even smiled fondly, “Shouldn’t you know? I mean, you lived third year already...  _ twice! _ ” 

 

Surprised, Even coughed on a laugh, “Hey!”

 

They laughed together and despite their distance, Even felt like Isak was near him. 

 

“Faen,” Even sighed, his smile still high on his cheeks, “I love you.”

 

With traces of laughter still in his tone, Isak returned the sentiment, “I love you, too.”

 

“I was thinking about you the other day,” Even mumbled, feeling nostalgic. 

 

Though, Isak snorted again, a tease dripping in his voice, “Just the other day? I don’t want to sound arrogant, but as Isak Valtersen, the man of your dreams, I think I have the right to assume you think of me  _ every day.” _

 

“Nei. Never. I rarely ever think of you,” Even smiled, shaking his head, despite Isak not being able to see him. 

 

“You know what?” Isak asked through laughter in his throat, “Fuck you. I’m finding a new boyfriend. Maybe an American one. Hopefully he’ll think of my more often than you, asshole.”

 

“Well,” Even started, keeping up the act they’d set, “if you’re planning on finding an American boyfriend, you should probably get on a plane right now and come find one.”

 

“Maybe. I’ve heard Oregon is where all the hot boys live.”

 

“I don’t know who told you that, but I’d say it’s worth a shot.”

 

Isak breathed a soft laugh, “ _ And  _ since we’re broken up, now, you can help me find a new boyfriend. This whole thing sounds intriguing enough, yeah?”

 

“Definitely.”

 

“Though, if I really think about it… I think Norwegian boys are more up my alley.”

 

“Me, too. Especially ones with curly blonde hair and green eyes that are fucking beautiful. Not to mention kinda nerdy - no, actually, super nerdy. Way too smart for their own good kind of nerdy. Sarcasm isn’t too bad, either.”

 

“Not really my type. But if we’re talking about getting you a new boyfriend, I don’t think I know anybody who fits that description.”

 

“Fuck, I tried,” Even said, faux exasperation in his tone. 

 

“What about a tall, lanky boy for me? Preferably with blue eyes and a James Dean vibe. A boy who obnoxiously quotes movies that nobody has ever seen before. He’s got to have a bad case of resting bitch face that makes him look like he could actually kill you, but ends up being the softest human on the earth.  _ Oh, _ and one that thinks about me  _ every _ day instead of just occasionally like my asshole ex.”

 

Even finally cracked, “First of all, I do not have resting bitch face,  _ you do _ . And second, I think of you every fucking second of every fucking day. And third, this has gone on so long I forgot why we were doing this until you just reminded me.”

 

“I never said I didn’t have resting bitch face. I just said that you definitely  _ do _ .”

 

“I do not.”

 

“Yes,” Isak said, not swaying his statement, “You get slightly scrunched brows and your mouth sits in the cutest fucking pout, but I’m slightly biased. To anyone else it’s not cute. If you get in your head you can look super intimidating because you’re  _ intense _ , Even. Don’t get me wrong, it’s fucking hot, but you  _ do _ have resting bitch face.”

 

“Fyfaen,” Even laughed at how serious Isak sounded about the point he was trying to make. “I’ll take your word for it.”

 

“Good.”

 

“ _ Anyway, _ ” Even started, again. “Back to what I was saying—“

 

Isak jumped in again, cutting him off with another tease, “Yes, back to the lucky moment where you thought about me  _ a few days ago _ .”

 

Even smiled, ignoring Isak and treading on, “I was thinking about how we got together.”

 

The admission seemed to sober Isak up, leaving him quiet. 

 

“Is?”

 

“I heard you, I just thought you’d say more.”

 

Even shrugged at the sky, “Yeah, there’s more, I guess. It’s not really anything we don’t know, though.”

 

“It’s okay. I want to hear.”

 

“I just…” Even sighed. “I was thinking about how things felt so fucking complicated when we first got together. And I feel like it’s always been complicated, you know? First it was the age gap, then it was me being bipolar. After that it was the school change and everything that happened last year. And now, I’m halfway across the world. I just don’t get how we were dealt these cards that are so fucking hard to play.”

 

“Ev,” Isak said. His voice was calm and concerned. “We can handle any single thing that is thrown our way, I’m convinced of that. We’ve never not been able to face something. And I’m sure we both can agree that despite the complicated things we’ve faced, we have triple the amount of outstanding happy memories.”

 

“I guess so.”

 

“Even.”

 

“Hmm?”

 

Isak took a deep breath and it actually soothed Even a little, “We make a really good team. That’s why we’re faced with all this bullshit, not because we’re unlucky. It’s because we  _ can _ get through it. And all that said bullshit usually ends up being some of the best things about us.”

 

Even nodded, staring at his feet, “I can’t argue that.”

 

“In case you’ve forgotten from the long flight, the jet lag or some other far out reason, I love you. And that’s not going to change.”

 

“Yeah,” Even nodded. “I love you, too.”

 

“I want you always, even if that means you have to be away for awhile. I support you and will help with whatever I can.”

 

“You’re right.”

 

“I’m always right. I’m a nerd, remember?”

 

The two laughed, “How could I forget?”

 

“I love you - again. I’m going to go to bed.”

 

“I love you, too. Sleep well, Issy. I’ll call tomorrow.”

 

“Goodnight.”

 

After they hung up, Even sent Isak a text that held a single red heart as he found his way back to his new home. 

  
  
  
  
  



	9. wednesday - august

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fourth week of August.   
> Two more of Even’s classes.   
> Lunch with Lucy.   
> FaceTime with family.   
> Talk with Isak.   
> Preston meddles with Even’s love life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I love this chapter for some reason? Hahaha I don’t have too much to say for this note, but I love you and I hope you all enjoy this chapter as much as I did. 
> 
> I’m thinking of doing 2-4 “days” of each week and then a flashback between each week? Does that even make sense? Hopefully it does! Also, I’ve written a chapter to come later down in the story and it’s 9k words and it might be one of my favorite pieces of writing I’ve ever created, so I’m really looking forward to that chapter to come up!❤️ 
> 
> Anyway,  
> Much love and   
> always always happy reading xx

Even quickly learned that Wednesday’s were great. 

 

He had biology with Lucy and was excited to be paired with her for the semester. 

 

She truly was a ray of sunshine, which is what Even needed. She also happened to be a genius at biology, which lead him to think of his love back home. 

 

“I’m awful at biology, so you might have to tutor me,” Even joked in a whisper as the professor rambled about syllabuses and disclosure statements for the course. 

 

Lucy grinned, turning more to Even, “This is entry level biology, Even. It’s not  _ that  _ difficult.”

 

“I think you’d be surprised at how shitty I am with science.”

 

“Although I don’t believe you, I’ll still tutor you,” Lucy snickered with an eye roll. 

 

Even smiled at it. His mind floating back to Isak, again and again and again. Always. 

 

As if on cue, Isak snapchatted Even.

 

Even opened it right then, seeing a photo of a pouting Isak. The words on the screen were captioned, “Jonas ditched me for Eva.”

 

And  _ fuck _ . Isak looked so damn cute with his eyebrows drawn in and lower lip pouting out. Even wanted to take a screenshot so fucking bad, but he was nervous with Lucy sitting beside him. 

 

Glancing over at Lucy, Even saw she was paying attention to the professor again and took it as a safe call to screenshot the snapchat. 

 

He’d keep it for later. 

 

He angled the front facing camera on himself, which caught Lucy’s attention as she snuck half her face in his photo over his shoulder. 

 

Even laughed and hoped Isak would, too. 

 

He typed,  _ Sorry, Issy. Wish I could help, but I’m stuck in bio for another half hour. X” _

 

He sent it off, shooting a grin at Lucy before turning back to the professor. 

 

And when the time  _ finally _ came, the professor ended their class for the day. 

 

“What do you have going on right now? Do you want to grab an early lunch?” Lucy asked, gathering her things together and standing up. 

 

Even nodded, checking the time and following her actions, “Yeah, sure.”

 

Even and Lucy walk side by side with each other. They had decided to go eat at the food trucks for lunch, since it was fast and easy.    
  
It reminded Even of the laser tag date he and Isak went on with Eva and Jonas. He couldn’t help but think of all the fun they had that day.    
  
He pictured Isak in his head, dancing around after his win and then letting Even share the win. Whereas Eva was no into sharing her win with Jonas.    
  
He thought about how they talked about marriage, which was a little weird, a little intimidating but it was so intriguing and exciting at the same time.    
  
He also thought about what happened the next morning, waking up and finding Isak riding him.    
  
Fuck.    
  
He would happily live that weekend again and again, if he could.    
  
Even smiled to himself as he paid for his meal and walked just a few paces behind Lucy to a nearby picnic table.    
  
They sat across from each other and began to dig into their food.    
  
“So, how’s everything been so far? You know, with being away from home? From your friends? And family?”   
  
Even nodded along with Lucy’s questions, “Fine. Yeah. I mean, I miss them already, but it’s been okay. I’ve liked it here a lot, so that helps. Using English all the time is a little strange, but I think I’m really starting to nail it.”

 

Lucy smiled, “The boys really like you - Preston and Elijah. They think you’re so cool. It’s refreshing to see them interested in hanging out with new people.”

 

“Nah,” Even laughed, waving his hand in dismissal. “They just like that I teach them how to swear in Norwegian.”

 

“ _ Faen, _ ” Lucy emphasized, laughing. 

 

“Exactly,” Even grinned.

 

“I’m just kidding,” Lucy sighed, her mouth still pulled back in an amused smirk. “They really do like you, though.”

 

Even shrugged, “That’s good. I like them, too.”

 

“Yeah?” 

 

Even nodded, “Sure. They’re cool.”

 

Even’s phone pinged with another snapchat notification, seeing Isak’s name on the screen. 

 

He opened in immediately, to be met with an equally adorable pout as before. 

 

The caption read,  _ Fuck, are you ditching me for a girl, too? _

 

Smiling, Even tipped his phone upward to get a candid shot of Lucy eating her lunch. Her fork was in her mouth as she hummed, seeming to be contemplating what Even said. 

 

She was looking down at her lap, and something about the picture made Even really happy. Like he’d just taken a photo of someone who will mean a great deal to him one day. 

 

Even typed a caption quickly before sending it off,  _ Had to. Without you, I’d fail bio. I need her. She's the new biology genius in my life, sorry baby.  _

 

Isak returned with a fast response in the messaging section of snapchat,  _ Fuck you.  _

 

Even:  _ Haha, I love you, Issy ❤️ _

 

Isak: ❤️

 

Isak:  _ I love you, too. _

 

Isak:  _ Facetime later? _

 

Even: _ Yes❤️❤️ I have one more class, but it’ll be over before it gets too late for you _

 

Isak:  _ Okay❤️:) _   
  


“Cool?” Lucy repeated, bringing Even’s attention back to her. 

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Are you sure that’s how you feel? You seem like someone who would be rather…  _ articulate _ with expressing their feelings.”

 

Even sighed, not wanting to give in, but also not wanting to lie. So, he settled somewhere in the middle. “I am, usually. I just,” he paused, looking around him before settling on Lucy again, “I just question some of the things they do and say.”

 

“ _ They _ as in plural?”

 

Even shook his head with a teasing smile, “Lucy, are you fishing for information, here?”

 

“Maybe,” Lucy said, leaning forward with both arms on the table. “Tell me all the dirty secrets about your roommates.”

 

Upholding the amused atmosphere, Even explained, “First of all, it’s been like five days, I don’t really have any dirt on anyone I live with. And second, do you honestly think I’d relay my potentially existing doubts about my roommates to someone so close to them? Example, you - girlfriend of one, twin to the other.”

 

“That hardly matters. What happens between you and I, stays.”

 

“We’ll see,” Even smirked. “For now, I’m going to keep to myself about shit and maybe I’ll tell you in the near future.”

 

“Fuck you,” Lucy laughed. “But, I get it. I can respect your space… for now.”

 

___

 

Two hours later, Even was walking out of his math class, thankful that Noah had it with him. He isn’t sure how he lucked out with having people he knew in his classes, but so far he had friends in three of his four courses. 

 

He was humming to himself when he bumped into a girl coming from the other direction. 

 

“I’m so sorry,” she said and Even had to double take as he recognized her from his film class the day before. It was Taylor, the girl Preston introduced him to. 

 

“It’s okay. I should be the one saying sorry,” Even smiled, taking a small step back, widening what was a too close proximity. 

 

“No, you’re fine. It’s… Even, right?”

 

Even nodded with a grin, “Yes. And you’re Taylor?”

 

“Yeah,” she whispered, hugging her binder close to her chest. “That’s me. So, you like film?”

 

Even nodded again, “I do. It’s kind of what I want to do with my life - make movies.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Yeah, I love all kinds of films, but the best ones are the ones that make you feel things. I want to do that.”

 

Taylor smiled, “That’s really cool. I think most of the people in that class only took it to watch movies and not have the homework load.”

 

Even shrugged, “Maybe, but I enjoy it.”

 

“It sounds like it.”

 

Even felt his phone vibrating in his pocket and pulled it out, seeing Isak’s contact on the screen. 

 

_ My Baby❤️ would like FaceTime… _

 

“Taylor, I’m sorry,” Even started, looking between her face and his phone. “I’ve got to take this, but I’ll see you around?”

 

Taylor nodded, her smile hardly disguised her disappointment. “Yeah, I’ll see you.”

 

With a wave, Even walked away and answered the call, seeing Isak laying in Even’s bed. 

 

Even smiled at his boyfriend, “You look extremely comfortable.”

 

Isak nodded, cuddling into the pillow, “Yeah, I am.”   
  


“What are you doing?”

 

“Nothing. What are you doing?”

 

Even switched from the front facing camera to the back facing camera, showing Isak the campus, “I’m leaving class.”

 

“Your campus is really beautiful.”

 

Even flips the camera again, letting Isak see his face, “Yeah, it is. Issy, you’d fucking love this place. They are pretty much known for their science programs. You would completely geek out over here.”

 

Isak smiled, nodding, “I bet. I’ll see it when I come visit in November, right?”

 

Even shrugged, “Maybe. I’m not really sure what we’re going to do. Noah mentioned that he was spending the Thanksgiving holiday with his family and invited me to come along. I told him you were coming, and he said you were welcome, as well.”

 

“Do you want to do that?”

 

“I don’t know. But, we can figure it out as it gets closer, can’t we?”

 

“Yes, for sure.”

 

A short moment passes without any words exchanged before Isak shifts gears, “I should probably put pants on and go upstairs. Your mom knows we were going to facetime and she wants to see you.”

 

Even nodded, “Fair enough. Did you have dinner there tonight?”

 

Isak tipped his head in affirmation, “Yeah, my mom, too. Elle asked me to help with her homework and my mom didn’t have anything to grade, so we both came over.”

 

“That’s nice, baby.”

 

“Yeah, it was. It was weird not having you here, but we call managed. Your family misses you, but God, Even, they’re so fucking proud of you.”

 

The compliment made Even’s heart grow in size and warmth, “Thanks, Issy.”

 

“I mean it, Ev. They talk about you all the time. Today, Elle just kept asking me questions about you, like she didn’t know the answers to them. And we were looking through that book she made me for Christmas last year, and she had me retell the stories to almost every picture in the book.”

 

“I miss her,” Even sighed, eyes dragged across Isak’s face.

 

“You want to go talk to her?”

 

Even nodded, finding a picnic table to sit at. It was a nice day, the weather hadn’t changed much since he had lunch with Lucy. He watched Isak get out of bed, setting the phone down, giving Even the perfect view of his ceiling.

 

“Pants?” He asked, teasingly.

 

“Ja,” Isak chuckled.

 

“Do you frequently hang out in my bed without pants on?”

 

Isak poked is face into view of the camera, “You already know the answer to that.”

 

“Are you sleeping at my house tonight?”

 

Isak nodded his head, picking up the phone again, “Yeah, I have a pre exam for my maths class and I want to have a decent shot at actually getting  _ some _ of the questions right.”

 

“And you need my bed for that?” Even teased, smirking.

 

Isak blushed, “I sleep better here. It’s like your close to me. Your room smells like you and your bed at least halfway fools me into thinking you’ll be there at some point in the night.”

 

“Baby,” Even says, a smiley pout taking over his smirk, “You’re so fucking cute.”

 

“Yeah, yeah, be quiet before I hang up on you.”

 

“You wouldn’t.”

 

Isak tipped his head to the side in a challenge, “Oh, I wouldn’t?”

 

“Nei, you love me too much, plus, if my mom knew you hung up on me before letting her talk to me, you’d be fucked.”

 

“Fuck, you’re right,” the two boys laughed as Isak trudged up the stairs, finding Elle in the living room, first. “Elle,” Isak started, “I have your loser brother on the phone, do you want to talk to him?”

 

Isak sat down beside her on the couch, after Even assumed she nodded at his question.

 

Even cleared his throat, “I’m going to pretend you didn’t just call me a loser.”

 

Isak smiled, letting Elle take his phone from him, “Hei, Even!”

 

“Halla.”

 

“I miss you.”

 

Even smiled sadly, “I miss you, too, Elle.”

 

“How’s your school?”

 

“It’s good. I’ve made some new friends and none of my classes are too boring.”

 

Elle grinned and it made Even smile, he missed her. 

 

“How is  _ your _ school?” Even asked back.

 

Elle nodded, “Good, I think. It’s the same as every year. Just different teachers.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

She smiled as she nodded, and went into stories about her friends at school and a new show she’s watching. 

 

Even told her about Lucy and Noah, and all the beautiful things he’s seen on campus so far. 

 

Even’s parents caught wind of the conversation, and soon, the four people he loved the most were in frame. And Even smiled so so widely. 

 

He missed them all so much. 

 

His mom and dad stood behind the couch where Isak and Elle were sitting, and they asked so many questions. Even tried keeping up, but he smiled and felt a lot of love from their questions. 

 

Isak had his head resting on Elle’s shoulder. His eyes were closed, but Even knew he wasn’t sleeping and that he was very much so still paying attention. Whenever Even said something particularly funny or endearing, Isak would get the sweetest smile on his face. 

 

Although watching Isak do this was really motivating for Even to give the best answers, he made a mental note to question Isak about how he’d been sleeping. He did look a little tired - more tired than usual. 

 

And after thirty minutes of answering questions and relaying his week, it was time to say goodbye to his family. They all had early mornings the next day, between work and school, and it was getting late in Oslo. 

 

He said goodnight to his parents and Elle, telling them he loved and missed them, that he’d call again. 

 

He listened and waited patiently as Isak said his goodnights as well before descending the stairs. He first went into the bathroom to brush his teeth and then climbed back into Even’s bed, cuddling deeply into the sheets with a soft smile on his face. 

 

“Baby?” Even prompted. 

 

“Hmm?” 

 

“How’ve you been sleeping?”

 

Isak’s eyes perked up a teeny bit, “Fine. Not great, but good enough.”

 

“How many hours?”

 

Isak shrugged, “Five and a half… ish.”

 

Even nodded, “Will you call me if you can’t sleep?”

 

“Do you want me to?”

 

“Always.”

 

“Okay,” Isak sighed. “I’ll call you if I can’t sleep.”

 

“Good.”

 

Isak bit his lip, eyes wandering the screen and Even offered a little smile. Isak returned it, but his eyebrows were dipped in serious though. Even let him think through his thoughts. “Ev, I just… I really love you. And I miss you. I know when people are going to be away from home for a long time, telling them you miss them does more harm than good. It often makes them homesick. But, I don’t know what to do. You’re my best friend, and I really hate being away from you.”

 

“Issy,” Even said, his heart pinching in his chest. 

 

“It’s true. And I know codependency is so not healthy, I just… faen, Even. I don’t even know how to say how I feel.”

 

“It’s okay, Is. I get it.”

 

Isak nodded, “I know. And I’m probably just being dramatic, but we’re still in the single digits of being apart. It’s literally been six days and I feeling like this. How the fuck am I supposed to make it to November?”

 

“We can do it,” Even said, his voice was soft, but it was convincing enough. “We talked  _ yesterday _ about how we can make it through anything, right? You talked me down from my cloud of doubts, now it’s my turn to do the same. We’re going to be just fine. We’re keeping in touch in a lot of ways: texting, phone calls, Snapchat, FaceTime. All of those are keeping us together while I’m away.”

 

“I know. I just wish there was more.”

 

“More ways to talk? Fuck, Isak, do you want to email?” Even joked and it stirred a laugh from Isak, so he kept going. “I can mail you a letter. Or maybe we can get pagers.” More laughs and it made Even grin. So, what was one more jab with the joke? “What about telegraphs? We can come up with our own code and everything, so if it’s intercepted, nobody will be able to understand it.”

 

Isak chuckled again, shaking his head, “Good, we can get pretty raunchy sometimes.”

 

“Fuck yeah, we can. Now, I’m really sold. Isak, we  _ have  _ to do this. I intend to send you the dirtiest sexts via telegraph.”

 

“Stop,” Isak laughed, smiling widely at the camera, showing his adorable gappy teeth, before sinking further into the bed, showing his restfulness. 

 

“I love you,” Even said. “Bottom line, Issy, I don’t care  _ how _ we communicate. I just want you to always know that I love you and I’m always thinking of you.”

 

“You’re so fucking cheesy.”

 

“You love it.”

 

Isak nodded, small and fast, a pout forming. And Even could tell he was trying not to cry as he whispered, “I love you, Even.”

 

“I love you, Isak Valtersen. With my whole fucking heart,” he stated, hand over his heart for emphasis. 

 

“Me too.”

 

“You get some sleep, okay? And I’ll call again tomorrow.”

 

“Okay.”

 

“I love you. Sleep well.”

 

Isak smiled, “I love you, too. Goodnight.”

 

And with goodbyes said, Even hung up.

 

He felt peace. He knew long distance would be tough - he’s done it before with Isak. This was a little different, though. He knew they’d have to really rely on each other to get through. And he was hopeful. 

 

Though, his peacefulness was short lived as Preston plopped down across the table from him with a wide, obnoxious grin on his face. 

 

“What did you do?” Even said, skeptical of his roommate’s behavior. 

 

“I ran into Taylor.” Preston smirked, “Clear your schedule tomorrow night, you’re going on a date.”

 

“What?”

 

Preston popped his brows before getting up and walking away, calling over his shoulder, “You can thank me later.”


	10. thursday - august

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fourth week of August.   
> Journal  
> Coming clean to Mikael  
> Chatting with an insomnia prone Isak  
> Brief rundown of Even’s date with Taylor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Greetings everybody.   
> I hope you’ve all been well.   
> I’ve missed you. I’ll have a lot more time on my hands in the coming weeks to write and actually be consistent.   
> I didn’t dwell much on Even’s “date” in this chapter because as far as the story goes, it’s not a major event and I’d rather invest more heart and time into flashbacks than more minor events in the course of this story. I’ve been writing chapters for later in this story and it’s making me giddy. I just have to fill in (:   
> I think I’m planning on doing a 4-6 week time jump and pretty much skip of all “October.” I don’t want this story to drag too much. That’s All I Really Know happened over a course of like 5 weeks?? And this one will cover from August to December, which is more like 15 weeks lol.   
> Also, I’ve been sucked into the IT world recently omg. And was wondering if anyone would be interested to read an IT fic from me? It’s been on my mind the last few days... hmm. 
> 
> Anyway, here’s this little chapter. Let me know how you think! Next chapter is half way written, so I’ll have that soon ❤️❤️
> 
> All my love and happy reading Xx

_ School hasn’t been too bad. I’m actually really  loving it. The people here are diverse and new. Its weird, but it’s like taking a breath of fresh air. I feel like I have so much time here to learn and do new things. But, at the same time I’m really confused about how I feel about being here.  _

 

_ Oslo is definitely still begging me to come back. I think about it every day. Like, What if I just gave this all up and dropped out? What if I just showed up back at home without giving anyone a warning? What if I just… left?  _

 

_ I try not to let my head go too far down that route, though. I mean, I want to presently be here. And Isak is always good at pointing out when I’m not being attentive to the task at hand.  _

 

_ And fuck, I don’t even know where things are falling right now in terms of Isak. I’ve got myself is such a mess. I don’t really know why I lied to Preston and the others about being single. I feel like such a fuck up.  _

 

_ Beyond my poor choices, I’m now supposed to go on a date with Taylor today? What the fuck at I supposed to do?  _

 

_ I feel like I should tell Isak what’s happening. He’d know what to do. I might have a few years on him, but he’s so much smarter than me. I just really don’t want him to be upset with me and how utterly pathetic of a job I’m doing here.  _

 

_ I guess what I’m saying is… im struggling. _

  
  


Even’s phone ringing pulled him away from his journal writing, seeing Mikael’s name on the screen. 

 

“Halla!” Even answered, feeling more up than he did while writing. 

 

“Even!” Mikael cheered. “What’s up, buddy? How are you?”

 

“Good, yeah. How are you?”

 

“I’m doing awesome. Bro, Isak’s friends are fucking cool.”

 

Even smiled at the comment but was slightly confused, “Have you all been hanging out or something?”

 

“Yeah, all of us. Sana’s friends, too.”

 

Even listened as Mikael rambled on about all the things he and the others have been doing. 

 

“How’s Isak doing?”

 

“Have you not been talking to him?” 

 

Even shrugged, despite Mikael not being able to see him, “That’s not it. We’ve been talking, but part of me worries he’s putting on a face for me so I don’t worry about him.”

 

Mikael hummed, “I think he’s doing alright. He’s been there when we all hang out, so there’s that.”

 

Even nodded, “That’s good.”

 

“Are  _ you _ okay?”

 

“What? Of course. I’m fine.”

 

“Nei,” Mikael sighed. “Are you sure you aren’t putting on a face so Isak doesn’t worry about you?”

 

Even didn’t know what to say, so he remained silent. He thinks part of him couldn’t find an excuse because he wants to tell Mikael what a shit show he’s created for himself. He wants to talk to  _ someone _ who is close enough to the situation. 

 

“Even?”

 

“What?”

 

“Are you okay?”

 

Finally, he caved. “I don’t know. Mikael, I think I fucked up.”

 

“Talk to me. What happened?”

 

And Even let it out. He told him about Preston’s homophobic jokes and insults, day after day. He told him about his lie, saying he was single and not letting on any suspicion that he was remotely into boys. And he told him how he’s going on a date tonight with a girl he doesn’t really know, even though he’s committed to Isak. And cherry on top? He told him that he’s scared of Isak finding out. 

 

“Fuck,” Mikael breathed out, digesting all of the new information. 

 

“Yeah,” Even groaned, moving from his desk to go lie down on his bed. 

 

“What the fuck are you going to do?”

 

“I don’t know.”

 

“You can't do nothing, Even.”

 

Even huffed, “I fucking know that, Mikael.”

 

“Bro, chill,” Mikael said. “You’re fine. Isak should be able to be understanding about it all, considering what happened last year with him.”

 

Even nodded, “Yeah… I’ll figure it. Thanks for listening.”

 

“Always. Talk to you later, buddy.”

 

“Bye, Mik.”

 

Even sighed, dropped his phone on the bed before getting up. 

 

He didn’t have class on Thursdays, which he sort of wished he did so he could have something to distract his mind.

 

He talked with Preston the night before about cancelling the date, but Preston wouldn’t let him. 

 

“I guess I’m going on a date,” Even mumbled to himself, a groan following. 

 

___

 

Even got ready, pulling on nicer-than-usual clothes. Even though he didn’t want to participate in this date, he felt Taylor still deserved the respect of a cleaned up date. 

 

He styled his hair the way he always did and avoided his roommates as he slipped out the front door. 

 

His phone rang, Isak’s contact flashing across the screen, which he considered ignoring. But, he immediately felt like an ass for thinking that. And after he noted what time it was in Oslo, he hurried and answered. 

 

“Halla?”

 

“Hei,” Isak sighed, his voice soft. 

 

“Are you okay?”

 

“Yeah. Just tired and I can’t sleep.”

 

Even glanced at the time again, it was 6:15pm in Oregon and 3:15 in the morning in Oslo. “Do you want to talk? Are you stressed?”

 

As Even waited for Isak to respond - put the phone on speaker in case he misses him - he sent a message to Taylor. Not canceling, because he didn’t want to be rude, he just send a simple text asking to postpone half an hour. 

 

_ Hi, Taylor. Sorry to ask, but can I push us back to 7? _

 

“I don’t know. I just wanted to hear your voice.”

 

“Okay. But you’re okay?”

 

Isak hummed, “Yes. Will you just talk to me? Tell me about your day or something?”

 

Isak’s prompting reminded Even of when they had previously been doing long distance. Isak would ask Even often to just recall his day to help him sleep. 

 

Even when they’d be in the same bed, Isak would occasionally ask Even to talk him to sleep. 

 

“I didn’t do too much today. It was actually kind of boring. I started reading this book…” Even carried on. He talked about everything he could think of in the moment. 

 

He told Isak about his classes and what he’d found in his readings. 

 

He told Isak about Lucy and having biology with her. The professor had mentioned in class they’d be working on a term long experiment with popcorn kernels. It was a bit silly, trying to give a kernel the right conditions to actually sprout something, but he was having fun, though. And he never thought he’d say he was having fun in biology. 

 

He talked about Logan and Noah. He really loved hanging out with them both. He thought Isak would really like them, as well. He could see the four of them being good friends, even after Even returned to Oslo. 

 

He talked about his other roommates. He really liked Elijah. Preston was a little iffy, but he was managing. He told Isak about going to  _ American college football games _ . 

 

And finally, when soft snores filled the line, Even quietly told his sleeping boyfriend how much he loved him, how much he missed him, and how fucking sorry he was for hiding who he was. 

 

Sighing into the phone, he said, “Sleep well, Issy.” Then he hung up, and went on his way toward Taylor’s dorm. 

 

___

 

Taylor and Even sat at dinner and it wasn’t strange or uncomfortable. Conversation flowed nicely and Even learned that he and Taylor actually have a lot in common. Starting with movies and going through a variety of topics before landing on dating. 

 

“So, What are you… what are you looking for in a girl?” 

 

Taylor’s question hung in the air, much like Even’s jaw. “Uhh.”

 

“You know, important qualities?”

 

Even nodded, “Right, well…”

 

His thoughts ran through a lot of scenarios before leaving him with three options: play along, use a loophole or come clean. 

 

Apparently the loophole won, as Even sat up a little straighter and spot with careful words. “Taylor, I think you are really sweet. I think we get along great and I’d love to get to know you better. But, just as friends. I came out tonight tonight because I genuinely like you as a person, just not in a romantic kind of way. I’m sorry if that was wrong of me.”

 

Taylor blinked a few times before letting out a confused, “Oh.”

 

“I’m sorry, Taylor.”

 

“Is it something I said... or did?”

 

“What?” Even asked, exasperated. “No, no, no. You’re great. I just - I have feelings for someone back home.”

 

Taylor nodded, “It’s okay. They’re really lucky and I hope they know that.”

 

Even smiled softly, “Thanks.”

 

“So, uh,” Taylor started, pushing her plate forward as she was finished eating. “Do you want to go mini golfing?”

 

Even was relieved and excited that Taylor wasn’t upset as he nodded. “I would fucking love to.”

  
  
  



	11. two years + five or so months ago

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even and Isak go on their first date.  
> They go to an arcade (bc I'm from America and love that kind of shit)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy this late late late update<3
> 
> All my love.
> 
> Happy reading!

Even couldn’t remember when he’d been so simultaneously nervous and excited. He looked over himself in the mirror, dressed in jeans - a rare occasion - and a white henley. He topped off the outfit with a bomber jacket. 

 

He and Isak were going out that night.

 

They were going on a date. 

 

Their  _ first date _ . 

 

Even bit his lip, shaking his head with a hidden smile. 

 

“You look hot,” a voice came from behind him.

 

He turned around, seeing Isak standing in the doorframe. “Hey, you’re early.”

 

Isak nodded, pushing further into the room, approaching Even. He put his arms around Even’s shoulders and Even welcomed him by sliding his hands around the small of Isak’s back. Even greeted Isak with a firm kiss, it had been almost three weeks since they’d seen one another. 

 

And Even really missed him. 

 

“Hei,” Even hummed against Isak’s mouth.

 

“Hei,” Isak smiled up at his boyfriend. Soon after, his face dropped slightly before his eyes went squinty in suspicion. “Is that my jacket?”

 

Even immediately burst into laughter, “You left it here.”

 

“Fuck you. I’ve been looking for that.”

 

“Well, I’m going to wear it anyway.”

 

Isak rolled his eyes, leaning up for another kiss, “Whatever.”

 

Even cupped Isak’s cheek, dusting his thumb over tired circles under his eyes.

 

He left soft pecks across Isak’s under eyes before stepping out of their embrace to hold out his hand toward his boyfriend, “Ready to go?”

 

Isak blushed slightly, “Yeah. I’m ready.”

 

On the way out the door, Even kissed his mother’s cheek goodbye before leaving. 

 

___

 

Even was sitting across from Isak at dinner. 

 

His heart was in his throat as he peeked at Isak over his menu. 

 

Isak was hunched over the table, biting his thumb nail as he looked over his own menu. His brows were drawn in tightly as he head his other arm neatly across his stomach. 

 

Even watched as he yawned, moving his hand to cover his mouth before blinking a few times. He watched him sigh. He watched him check the time. And he watched him slowly close his menu. 

 

Even smiled, amused at Isak’s behavior, “Are you bored?”

 

“Hmm?” Isak hummed, eyebrows shooting high in question. 

 

“Are you bored?”

 

“Nei,” Isak shook his head, smiling. “Just a little tired.”

 

“We didn’t have to go out tonight, Is.”

 

Isak shrugged, “It’s okay. I wanted to.”

 

They shared a soft smile before their server came to take care of them. And while Even was ordering, he felt Isak hook their ankles together under the table. He sent a quiet fond look toward his adorable boyfriend before watching the server retreat. 

 

Even looked over at Isak, “I know it’s already been two months since we really got together and I’m sorry that this is our first date. It seems… overdue.”

 

Isak shrugged, “It’s okay. I’m not upset. We don’t see each other  _ too _ often, so it doesn’t feel like it’s been put off or anything. And we both know staying home usually wins over going out.”

 

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

 

“I’m always fucking right, Even.”

 

Even shook his head, “Bullshit.”

 

Isak lightly kicked him under the table, “You know it’s true.”

 

“Whatever,” Even smiled, admiring Isak. 

 

“So, what are we doing tonight?”

 

“We’re just going to have some fun.”

 

Isak rolled his eyes, leaning against the table, “Spill it. It’s really cliché to keep a first date a surprise, Even.”

 

Even shrugged, leaning forward on his elbows, “So is falling for your best friend, but look at the two of us.”

 

Isak immediately blushed, which was exactly what Even was hoping for, “We don’t have to live  _ every _ cliché, though.”

 

“Why not?” Even was just teasing. He liked to challenge Isak. It excited him. And it was more entertaining during the times where he could get his younger boyfriend a little flustered. 

 

But, Even was even  _ more _ entertained when Isak surprised him. 

 

“We deserve an original love story.”

 

“That might just be the cheesiest shit I’ve ever heard you say, Isak. And I’ve known you for  _ how many years _ ?” 

 

“Yeah, okay, okay. I think you’re wearing off on me or something.”

 

“We already do, by the way - we have an original love story,” Even said, a  _ soft soft _ smile on his lips. “And we will continue to.”

 

Isak bit his bottom lip, rolling it slightly between his teeth before nodding, “Fuck yeah, we will.”

 

___

 

“You have  _ two hours _ ,” Mikael said pointedly, holding up two fingers for emphasis as he ushered Even and Isak inside through the back door. 

 

Mikael worked at an arcade and all the boys loved it. Every now and then, he would sneak the friends in after closing to come play all the games without anyone there. Mikael also would set them up with endless game tokens.

 

Isak had never done it before and Even saw a first date as the perfect opportunity to actually take Isak to the arcade. Isak had expressed interest in going, and Even just wanted to have fun with Isak. He always had fun with Isak, but this was  _ different _ . It was a date. And Even couldn’t keep the smile off his face.

 

Mikael gave them a small bucket of tokens, “This should be more than enough, but find me somewhere around here if you run out.” 

 

Even nodded, glancing at Isak who was wandering a few feet away to look at the different arcade games. 

 

_ Fuck, he was cute.  _

 

Mikael patted his shoulder, with a quiet whisper, “No sex here, thanks.”

 

Even whipped around to glare at him, “He’s fucking fifteen, Mikael.”

 

Mikael shrugged before walking away, “Have fun, kiddies.”

 

Even shook his head as he walked over to Isak. All the lights in the arcade danced across Isak’s glassy green eyes. He felt his heart nearly burst at the sight. 

 

Isak looked up at him with a wide grin, causing Even to lean down and press a peck to his mouth. It resulted in Isak blushing softly, but pressing up to his top toes to return the gesture. 

 

“Let’s go play some games,” Isak announced, bouncing on his feet. 

 

Even nodded, his grin cemented in place. He’d known for a long time that he was fucked. Isak had had him wrapped tightly around his finger for years and now that they were  _ together _ it was worse. 

 

Even knew that in reality, with everything so new and young, the future was blurry. He didn’t know how long they’d last or where their lives would take them. But he hoped, with every fiber of his being, that they would remain friends at the very least. 

 

And he  _ wished _ that he and Isak would make it. For… well, for forever. 

 

He knew Isak was it for him. Even though they were in high school with hardly any life experience, Even just wanted Isak. 

 

They played almost every single game and laughed the whole time. 

 

They chatted about everything going on in their lives. They talked about movies and books. Even complimented Isak on silly things, just to get an eye roll. But, he also would pause and kiss him suddenly or compliment what he found attractive about Isak with full intention of seeing him blush. 

 

When they played mutli-player games, they both tried sabotaging the other in hopes of winning. 

 

They teased and finally after bickering over Pac-Man, Even pushed Isak up against the side of an arcade machine, cornering him. 

 

“You cheated,” Even accused, trapping Isak in. 

 

“Nei,” Isak laughed, leaning his head back against the machine so he could comfortably look up at Even. “I’m just the  _ master _ of arcade games.”

 

“Sure, Isak. Whatever you say.”

 

“It’s not my fault that you’ve managed to lose  _ every _ single game we’ve played in the last ninety minutes.”

 

And in reality, Even mostly just let Isak win, because he wanted to see the smug grin Isak would get when his player flashed across the screen, declaring him the winner.

 

But, Even still groaned, looking down at his boyfriend. Fuck, he had a _boyfriend_. And the thought made him break into a smile. A really cheesy smile. 

 

“What?” Isak asked with stars in his eyes and a laugh in his tone. 

 

Even shook his head, “I’m just really fucking happy that this is my life right now.”

 

“You’re so fucking soft,” Isak belted out a laugh before pulling Even closer so their lips met in the middle.

 


	12. tuesday - september

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First week of September   
> Even and Taylor are now friends and have been hanging out   
> Elle calls Even and finds out about Even keeping Isak a secret. And she gives him some advice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not a lot to be said today, just that I love you and am endlessly thankful for you❤️❤️❤️❤️   
> Sending my love. 
> 
> Happy reading Xx

The weekend passed by before Even could really process it. And he found himself walking around campus with Taylor after lunch on Tuesday. 

 

He really liked spending time with her. She made him laugh and she had tons of stories to tell. 

 

She also asked questions. Dozens of them. She wanted to know everything, with that curious glint in her eyes. Even thought it was kind of funny how they only met the week prior. She seemed much more timid than she did now. And it reminded him of Isak. 

 

He’d also been hanging out with Noah and Logan a bit. And they were refreshing to be around, too. They were going to go get pizza that night and do homework together. Taylor was coming along, too. 

 

It was going to be so nice. 

 

He was in the middle of telling a story when his phone started to ring.  _ Elle _ , flashed across the screen as he looked over at Taylor. It was a FaceTime call and his eyes lit up a little. 

 

“You want to meet my sister?”

 

“Um… yes!” Taylor leaned closer to Even’s shoulder as he accepted the call. 

 

Elle’s face came on the screen and everyone was smiling. 

 

“Halla,” Even greeted, teeth on show. 

 

“Hei, Even.”

 

“Hei,” he chuckled before introducing the two girls in English. “Elle, this my friend Taylor. And Taylor, this is my little sister Elle.”

 

“Elle? That name is so pretty.”

 

“Thanks,” Elle said with a blush. “How do you two know each other?” 

 

Even and Taylor shared a shrug before looking back to Elle, “Class and mutual friends?” Even said it, but it came out more like a question. 

 

And it made Taylor laugh, “We went on a date last week but Even turned me down because he’s hopelessly in love with a lucky Norwegian girl back home.” Taylor clasped her hands together and batted her lashes to add to the dramatic statement. 

 

Even’s eyes went wide as he looked at Elle’s confused face. He subtly shook his head, saying in Norwegian, “Let’s talk about that later.”

 

“Are you making fun of me in Norwegian?” Taylor asked with a bright smile that held quiet laughter. 

 

Even shook his head, smiling, “Never.” He turned back to his sister who had squinty eyes, but that was a problem for later. “What’s up, Elle?” Even asked, in English. 

 

She answered him in Norwegian and Even assumed it was due to the lengthiness of the response. “Nothing, I just wanted to call. It’s getting late here and I haven’t talked to you since you and Isak FaceTimed the other day.”

 

Even nodded, “How is he?”

 

Elle rolled her eyes, “You talk to him every day, you know how he is.”

 

“Yeah, but… is he okay?” 

 

Elle shrugged, “He misses you. He sleeps here almost every night - he has dinner with us a lot. Marianne comes over for dinner, too. I’m pretty sure he was crying the other night, but he doesn’t know that I know. I couldn’t sleep, so I went down to your room to see if Isak was still awake. But I just turned around and went back upstairs when I heard him. It was more of sniffles, but still.”

 

Slowly, and with a pain in his chest, Even nodded, “I think I need to call him today.”

 

“Does he know about you going on a date?”

 

“Elle,” Even said, a warning in his tone. 

 

“What does she even mean by that? You went on a date? And what’s with her saying you’re in love with a  _ lucky Norwegian girl?” _

 

“ _ Elle, _ ” Even pressed. “Let me deal with this, okay?”

 

“So, you’re saying something  _ is _ going on?”

 

Even closed his eyes, took a deep sigh and turned to Taylor, but she cut him off. She could obviously grasp the tenseness of the conversation. She smiled as she said, “It’s okay. I’ll give you some time with her. Just text me later, okay?”

 

Even nodded, “I will.”

 

Taylor gave his wrist a squeeze and said goodbye to Elle before leaving Even behind. He took a seat on a nearby bench as he continued talking with Elle. 

 

“What’s going on, Even?”

 

“If I tell you, you’re just going to call me an idiot, Elle.”

 

“That’s what little sisters are for, aren’t they?” 

 

Even smiled, mirroring his sister, “Yeah. Yeah, I guess they are.”

 

“What’s happening? Are you and Isak fighting or something?”

 

“What? No, we’re fine. My roommate just drops these really shitty comments all the time about gay people and I just… I didn’t want to deal with that shit, so I kept Isak a secret.”

 

“Even,” Elle sighed, putting a hand to her forehead. “Do you not remember what happened last year or what?” 

 

“Obviously, I remember! It’s just all fucked up and I feel like I can’t say anything, now.”

 

“So?”

 

“What do you mean  _ So _ ?”

 

Elle pressed her lips in a thin line before she had her thoughts all gathered, “When have you ever cared? No, wait - I take that back. When have you  _ not _ cared? What made you suddenly stop standing up against people who say demeaning things? When people use stereotypes and generalizations or if they’re simply using words in a prejudiced or degrading way, you’re  _ always _ the first to shut it down. Where did that go?”

 

Even felt his brows dip in thought. She was right. And he hated that she was. “I don’t know.”

 

“Are you going to tell Isak?”

 

“How am I supposed to do that?” 

 

“I don’t know, Ev. He deserves to know, though. I won’t tell him, but I think you should.”

 

Even nodded, “I know.”

 

“And will you not… y’know, tell him about the crying thing?”

 

“I won’t. I promise,” Even sighed before changing the subject after a few moments of silence. “How’s school?”

 

“Good,” she talked about her different classes and teachers. She told him about the projects she had coming that she was dreading, but also the ones she was excited for. She had a Norwegian test coming up, but she wasn’t too worried. Isak was helping her study. And things really did sound  _ good _ . It made Even happy. 

 

A few minutes later, there was a knocking on Elle’s bedroom door. She offered a quick,  _ come in _ . 

 

“Hey, your mom told me to come grab you. Something about getting your laundry or something,” Isak’s voice filled the speaker and it did make Even smile. It always did. 

 

Elle nodded, “Yeah, I’ll be down. I’m talking to Even. Do you want to say hi?”

 

“You are?” Isak sounded hopeful. “And you didn’t say anything?”

 

Isak made his way into frame, leaning over Elle’s bed until Even could see his smiling face. 

 

“Hei, baby,” Even offered. 

 

“Hei.”

 

“What are you doing?”

 

Isak shrugged, “Just finishing homework for tonight.”

 

“Almost done?”

 

Isak nodded, “What are you doing?”

 

“I was just going for a walk when Elle called.”

 

“Well, you two can keep talking. I’ve got to finish some things. But can I call you when I’m done?”

 

Even smiled, nodding, “You can call me anytime.”

 

Elle smiles in the side of the screen making Even and Isak both turn a little pink. “Okay,” Isak started, “I love you.”

 

“I love you, too, Issy.”

 

“I’ll call you later.”

 

Even nodded, as Isak left the screen and Even heard the door close. 

 

“So… what are you going to do about that?”

 

Even groaned at Elle’s question, “I don’t fucking know.”

  
  
  
  
  



End file.
